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My name is Elliot, and here's a list of my conservative qualities

  • Everyday I'm glad to be a Christian. And I believe atheism is the most miserable and unpatriotic religion in existence today. And those are the nice things to say about it!
  • I am so fanatical about creation science. I believe science is a gift from God and I believe it should never be tainted by evolution. I have no doubt that evolution is an irrational belief closed to criticism and one of the worse ways to justify racism and tyranny
  • I believe that liberals are arrogant, argumentative, illogical, delusional, anti-marriage, anti-life, anti-happiness, anti-moral, anti-Christian, insulting, heartless and plain stupid.
  • I believe girls are naturally cute, sweet, sympathetic and a huge value to the men who love them. I believe feminism is full of witches and is a great threat to women. Also I believe that nothing is more superior than romantic heterosexual love.
  • The US Constitution is timeless.

Since I trust this website so much, I have decided to announce my wonderful ambition in life to nail those pesky liberals, I plan to write fictional stories that would erase liberal thinking. If you have ever wondered what liberalism would be like on Halloween, my stories will be the ones to read.

In them you'll step into an adventure of a stylish conservative athlete and his delightful girlfriend, a wise devoutly Christian English gent and many other brave people who will face an epidemic of monster creating atheists, demonic communist gangsters, zombie drug users, pantheistic environmentalists, feminist witches, ghoulish liberal judges, brainwashing public schools, murdering pick pocketing leprechaun socialists, barbaric futuristic totalitarian states and many more!

Along with being conservative, my stories shall be funny, uplifting, educational, exciting, creative, romantic and a perfect antidote to your troubles.

Anyway, wish me luck as I write these stories and let me know if you want me to write anything specific. Keep up the good work Conservapedia, and God bless!

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