Psychological manipulation can be perceived as an attempt made by manipulative person (manipulator) beyond his/her competence to cause the other person's (manipulated victim) specific conduct in certain matter, in accordance with own self-serving wishes of manipulator. From this point of view, to classify an act, maneuver or behaviour as manipulation assumes therefore the definition of competencies with rigid, infrangible boundaries. Then, for the undue crossing of that boundary, manipulation invokes the usage of unethical means.
The psychological manipulation is thus much most often encountered when people usurp the right to rule over the whole area of human life of another person, including his/her privacy, despite they still realize that they have no legitimate means to achieve for it. Briefly speaking, one could state that the principle of manipulation rests on the well-known profane saying "the end justifies the means." In the early 1970, psychologist Richard Christie made proposition that being manipulator in line with this principle is very nearly synonymous to so called Machiavellian personality. This distinct personality style is then characterized by manipulativeness, cynicism about human nature, and shrewdness in interpersonal behavior marked by using tactics that are exploitative, self-serving, and nearly always deceptive.
Techniques of manipulation
|Romain Rolland, French writer, about Genrikh Yagoda, Stalin’s hangman:|
|“But his police functions inspire horror. He speaks softly to you as he calls black white and white black,[note 1] and his honest eyes look at you with amazement if you begin to doubt his word.”|
Manipulator is using multitude of techniques in which he/she tries to hide his/her own true wishes and practices in the name of community welfare or higher power. Skilled manipulative people in power know the vulnerabilities of their opponents and usually are trying to elicit a feeling of guilt from their victims; they use emotional blackmail and make appeals for responsibility whereas on the other hand the attention is intentionally driven to distraction from the real issue or subject. During process of manipulation it is common to state things that are in discrepancy with reality or seriously distort it what normally in turn triggers a strong emotional reaction. That is then often proposed to be perceived by uninformed audience as an expression of soar, bad faith or lack of loyalty on the side of victim. For manipulator, an important factor is to focus on the way how to make the expected deformed impression rather than focus on facts or nature of the problem itself. If the one that manipulates succeeds in causing the strong emotive reaction, then he pretends to conduct himself in an extraordinarily kind manner, showing off as trying to achieve for settling the dispute, while pointing out it is the opponent who let himself to be governed by “bad faith” hence disclosing that the problem must be evidently at his side. In order to provoke inappropriate response, fabricated or invented disfavoring personal information is usually being spread, or even more preferably, some distorted real information presented against the victim of manipulation.
- Minimization/Minimizing. The manipulators use this tactic to convince victims and others that something manipulators did that was evidently wrong really wasn't as bad as one might think. When being confronted about their wrongdoing, manipulartors would claim victims are making a big deal of nothing or exaggerating or overreacting.
- Lying refers to situation when a speaking person is using language aiming to deliberately portray reality in discrepancy with its actual status. Cunning form of lying is manipulation as type of social influence when a manipulator wants, without being noticed as doing so, to change the way other people think, behave, or act. In order to achieve this, he associates terms, in reality representing one thing, with false labels that try to make appearance of term as if being other thing. When this technique is used by politicians or pressure groups promoting their own self-serving agendas, we speak about propaganda. For example, LGBTI propagandists Kirk and Madsen admitted to use “manipulability” in form of attaching culturally positive-sounding verbal labels to mask controversial sexual behavior and sexual anarchy generally known under the term sodomy. Journalist Masha Gessen admitted on behalf of so-called "LGBT" activists that "Fighting for gay marriage generally involves lying about what we are going to do with marriage when we get there — because we lie that the institution of marriage is not going to change, and that is a lie." Pathological lying and manipulation are typical to psychopaths. What makes psychopats different from all others is the remarkable ease with which they carry it out.
- Selective Inattention (or Selective Attention) Disturbed characters are good at seeing only what they want to see and hearing only what they want to hear. Stanton Samenow referred to their habit of paying highly selective attention as “mental filtering” or “paying attention only to what suits him.” “Tuning-out” someone who's trying to make a point, teach a lesson, or call attention to a problem is a principal way that the disordered character resists internalizing the values, standards, and controls society wants him to adopt.
- Diversion. Manipulator not giving a straight answer to a direct question and instead being diversionary, dodging the issue, giving "runaround" and steering the conversation away onto another subject.
- Evasion. Similar to diversion but giving irrelevant, rambling responses, weasel words, deliberate use of vagueness and lying by omission.
- Cover Intimidation
- Guilt Tripping
- Playing the Victim role – Manipulator portrays him- or herself- or themselves as a victim of circumstance or of someone else's behavior in order to gain pity, sympathy or evoke compassion and thereby get something from another. Caring and conscientious people cannot stand to see anyone suffering and the manipulator often finds it easy to play on sympathy to get cooperation. Advocates of LGBT ideology play the victim role wrt. devised circumstance that they were "born that way"  and wrt. people who dare to bring attention to risky aspects of "LGBT: lifestyle. The legitimate critics of sexual anarchy are then labeled as "homophobes", what is a term specially invented to vilify opponents and put them on the defensive, and at the same time trying to win public opinion in favor of "LGBT" agenda. During the era of Nazism followers of nazi ideology where portrayed as minority victim fighting for "equality" i.a. in Czechoslovakia, while at the same time they in fact organized pogroms against other minorities, esp. Jews.
- Vilifying the Victim is i.a. the tactic "to get tough with remaining opponents" adopted by radical extremists who support totalitarian LGBTI agenda. In their LGBTI Mein Kampf called After the Ball, they claim: "To be blunt, they [i.e. remaining opponents] must be vilified". Disturbed characters know well that neurotics hate to think of themselves as the injuring party and would rather carry the burden of abuse than see themselves as an abuser. So, when persons with disturbances of character want to take advantage, a good one-two punch is to play the victim and then vilify the real victims, for example, with labeling latter ones as “homophobic”. These behaviors often serve to reinforce the disturbed character's resistance to accepting social norms and responsibility (for example in the area of sexual moral), as well as serving as vehicles of manipulation and impression-management, (e.g. when trying to gain public acceptance for patterns of deviant behaviours bordering with and triggering the sexual anarchy).
- Playing the Servant Role
- Projecting the Blame (Blaming Others)
- Feigning Innocence
- Feigning Ignorance or Confusion
- Brandishing Anger
Non-verbal Techniques of manipulation
There are several tricks on the level of non-verbal communication aiming to gain dominance and evoke the feelings of guilt or anger. For example, it is possible to use long and quizzical glance focused onto eyes of other person what is in normal communication subconsciously perceived as unnatural. When given target person after some while decides to look to the side out of politeness, it naturally causes one to experience submissive emotion, which can be then misused by manipulator for introducing the uneven dominance into communication.
The second possible technique is to stage a failed greeting attempt or other similar defaming incident. It is very effective, in presence of witnesses, to stretch out a hand for farewell-shaking exactly in the moment when other person is turning backwards due to being just about to leave, thus having no chance for noticing and reacting, what is then implicitly interpreted as greeting refusal and impoliteness. It also serves its purpose in such moment to look around and get confirmed that others have noticed this “incident” and with pretended interest and contrite grimace let others know how this untactful refusal hurts and how one's feel sorry for that.
When we meet a person that is a disguised manipulator for first time, it might be easy to get impressed by his/her charity and seeming friendship, which would however last only until the first moment when we express our independent opinion different of his/her own or when we do something what is not up to his/her expectations.
Predispositions for becoming a victim of manipulation
Important aspects of character when examining the predisposition for becoming a victim of manipulation:
- Low Self-Confidence and lack of assertiveness
- Emotional Dependency
Many are interested to learn whether it is possible somehow to get out from reaches of manipulation. Although there could be found many good and forethought answers, they are unfortunately rarely of any avail to victims in their situations. Some specialists are convinced that although it is possible to resist the manipulative practices of individuals, it is not the same case if the given system as such is set up in a way that enables this manipulation or if it is even built up upon it. Breaking ties of manipulation is especially impossible if the manipulator holds a very high position. If in such case a person wants to act in a righteous way, avoiding lying and the usage of the same unethical and dishonest means, then his/her efforts are a priori condemned to failure. The bottom line question is however this: Why we should keep staying in the system that allows for manipulative practices or even connives and supports them? An individual that is routinely using manipulation as a basis for his carrier advancement seeks for letting himself to be surrounded solely by absolutely loyal people which are in return rewarded for this uncritical loyalty by special favor. These supporters who enjoy back-ally support then feel no hindrances to use lie, fraud or false testimonies. On the other side, a person who feels his/her own conscience is preventing him/her to apply similar dishonest measures, is in such system condemned to be eliminated beforehand. The rule of righteousness and fair practices can never be achieved in the systems that openly despise them.
- cf. "Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter." Isaiah 5:20, Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.®
- As a curiosity it is perhaps worth of mention that it has been suggested that there are some rather disturbed individuals that run Wikipedia via ArbCom (Arbitration Committee) and the cadre of Administrators what is perceived as its major defect which "will raise its head".
- Case study: Naboth's Vineyard
- Behavioral therapy
- Emotional manipulation
- Galileo's maxim
- Goebbels' maxim
- Aleš Franc. Co je manipulace? (What is manipulation?) (Czech). http://www.apologet.cz.
- Harriet B. Braiker (2004). Who's pulling your strings? How to break the cycle of manipulation and regain the control of your life. The McGraw Hill, 85. ISBN 0-07-144672-9.
- Donald Rayfield (2007). Stalin and His Hangmen: The Tyrant and Those Who Killed for Him. Random House Publishing Group, 229. ISBN 9780307431837.
- George Simon. Dr. Simon's Web Log & Archives: Psychological Manipulation (A clear voice for restoring the character of America). DrGeorgeSimon.Com. Retrieved on August 23, 2013.
- George Simon (1996, 2010). "9:Recognizing the Tactics of Manipulation and Control", In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and dealing with Manipulative People. Little Rock, USA: Parkurst Brothers, 111–136, 140–141. ISBN 978-1-935166-30-6.
- john brews (August 5, 2011). Wikipedia is the Encyclopedia that Anybody Can Edit. But Have You?: Comments. The Association for Psychological Science (previously the American Psychological Society). Retrieved on 2012-20-28. “As a professor of electrical engineering who contributed a great deal to WP, I would like to suggest that the members of the APS have a rather unique function to play there. My experience with WP has been fine on very technical matters, but on subjects with popular appeal there are very active and peculiar Talk page discussions that in my case led to eventual expulsion from WP. My take is that there are some rather disturbed individuals that run WP via ArbCom and the cadre of Administrators. I wonder if possibly APS members will be able to devise a useful method to deal with this major defect of WP, which I suspect indeed will raise its head.”
- Adelyn Birch (2015). "3. 30 Covert Emotional Manipulation Tactics", 30 Covert Emotional Manipulation Tactics: How Manipulators Take Control in Personal Relationships. CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform, 23.
- Gabriele Kuby. Globálna Sexuálna Revolúcia. Strata Slobody v mene Slobody. (Global Sexual Revolution. The loss of Freedom in the name of Freedom.) (in Slovak). Bratislava, Slovakia: Lúč. ISBN 978-80-7114-922-4. “The title in German original is “Die Globale sexualle Revolution.””
- David Cupelian (2005). The Marketing of Evil: How radicals, elitists, and pseudo-experts sell us corruption disguised as freedom. WND Books, 24–5. ISBN 978-1-58182-459-9.
- Robert R. Reilly. Making Gay Okay: How Rationalizing Homosexual Behavior is Changing Everything. Ignatius Press, 64. ISBN 978-1-58617-833-8.
- Robert D. Hare (2011). Without Conscience: The Disturbing World of the Psychopaths Among Us. Guilford Press, 125. ISBN 9781606235782.
- George Simon (March 30, 2009). Selective Listening and Attention: Hearing What You Want to Hear as a Manipulation Tactic. CounsellingResource.com. Retrieved on 17 April 2016.
- 12. Brian Camenker et al. (2017). "2. Gay-Lesbian-Bisexual Health Issues", [http://www.healthhazardsofhomosexuality.info The Health Hazards of Homosexuality What the Medical and Psychological Research Reveals]. MassResistance, 23. ISBN 978-15399-83811.
- George Simon (March 23, 2009). Vilifying the Victim: Manipulating You by Making You Feel Like the Bad Guy. CounsellingResource.com. Retrieved on 30 April 2016. “Neurotics hate to think of themselves as the injuring party and would rather carry the burden of abuse than see themselves as an abuser. Disturbed characters know this well. So, when they want to take advantage, a good one-two punch is to play the victim and then vilify the real victim. I’ve been posting a series of articles on behaviors commonly displayed by persons with disturbances of character. These behaviors often serve to reinforce the disturbed character’s resistance to accepting social norms and responsibility, as well as serving as vehicles of manipulation and impression-management. In a prior post, I explained the tactic of “Playing the Victim.” (See “Playing the Victim”.) A related tactic sometimes used in combination with the tactic of playing the victim is the tactic of vilifying the victim.”
- Aleš Franc (2008). Co je manipulace? (What is manipulation?) (Czech). Zápas o duši.