Talk:Bear

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@DunsScotus: I believe it would make more sense to append that definition of 'Bear' to the article on Homosexuality, or to create it as a separate article, instead of appending it to this one about the quadrupedal mammal. SquidFriend 14:50, 23 March 2007 (EDT)

That might be a good compromise, SquidFriend. DunsScotus 14:51, 23 March 2007 (EDT)
I concur if DunScotus puts this on Homosexuality I won't complain. but ONLY that article. Okay? Tmtoulouse 14:52, 23 March 2007 (EDT)
Putting it on the forsaken page of homosexuality seems to be a wise idea. Most good Christians would not want to go there and thus will never be exposed to this sort of debauchery. touchedbyabear 16:02, 23 March 2007 (EDT)

I'm glad others are beginning to see the true perfidiousness of the homosexual agenda. Even furry forest animals are not exempt from their smear campaigns (cf. rainbow). DunsScotus 16:07, 23 March 2007 (EDT)

Baby bears sure are adorable, aren't they? I wish I had one that would stay a baby forever to cuddle with. IMFromKathlene 05:38, 30 March 2007 (EDT)

Giving Thanks

An atheist was taking a walk through the woods, admiring all that naturalism and evolution had created. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!", he said to himself. As he was walking alongside the river he heard a rustling in the bushes behind.

As he turned to look, he saw a 7-foot grizzly charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing in on him. He tried to run even faster, so scared that tears were coming to his eyes. He looked over his shoulder again and the bear was even closer. His heart was pumping frantically as he tried to run even faster, but he tripped and fell on the ground.

He rolled over to pick himself up and saw the bear right on top of him raising his paw to kill him. At that instant he cried out "Oh my God!" Just then, time stopped. The bear froze, the forest was silent, the river even stopped moving. A bright light shone upon the man, and a voice came out of the sky saying, "You deny my existence all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit my creation to a cosmic accident and now do you except me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist, ever so proud, looked into the light and said "it would be rather hypocritical to ask to be a Christian after all these years, but could you make the bear a Christian?" "Very well," said the voice. The light went out, the river ran, the sounds of the forest continued and the bear put his paw down. The bear then brought both paws together, bowed his head and said, "Lord I thank you for this food that I am about to receive."

Haha! This should be added into the article, Ed. Greg 16:58, 14 October 2007 (EDT)
Is your name Gary Larson? ;-) --Ed Poor Talk 17:00, 14 October 2007 (EDT)
In middle school I convinced my classmates he was my uncle, but sadly there's no relation. :D Greg 17:01, 14 October 2007 (EDT)

Koala

Koalas aren't bears. They're marsupials. DanH 01:54, 19 December 2007 (EST)

See also: How to kill bears

There is something wrong in the brain wiring of someone who only sees the animal in such terms. AlanE 00:44, 19 February 2015 (EST)