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In the [[Summa Theologica]], Part II-II, Question 114, St. [[Thomas Aquinas]] speaks of a certain virtue which is commonly translated as “the friendliness which is called affability.” This friendliness, he notes, governs relationships between people because “it behooves man to be maintained in a becoming order towards other men as regards their mutual relations with one another, in point of both deeds and words, so that they behave towards one another in a becoming manner.” It does not only govern those relationships which are intimate or proximate; rather “Every man is naturally every man's friend by a certain general love; even so it is written (Ecclesiasticus 13:19) that ‘every beast loveth its like.’” This does not mean that everyone must be treated with equal intimacy – some people are connected to us by a closer bond than others – but that there is a minimum affability or common decency which is owed to all persons.<ref>[https://opwest.org/blog/the-friendliness-called-affability#:~:text=Thomas%20Aquinas%20speaks%20of%20a,mutual%20relations%20with%20one%20another%2C The Friendliness Called Affability], Dominican Friars</ref>}}

In the [[Summa Theologica]], Part II-II, Question 114, St. [[Thomas Aquinas]] speaks of a certain virtue which is commonly translated as “the friendliness which is called affability.” This friendliness, he notes, governs relationships between people because “it behooves man to be maintained in a becoming order towards other men as regards their mutual relations with one another, in point of both deeds and words, so that they behave towards one another in a becoming manner.” It does not only govern those relationships which are intimate or proximate; rather “Every man is naturally every man's friend by a certain general love; even so it is written (Ecclesiasticus 13:19) that ‘every beast loveth its like.’” This does not mean that everyone must be treated with equal intimacy – some people are connected to us by a closer bond than others – but that there is a minimum affability or common decency which is owed to all persons.<ref>[https://opwest.org/blog/the-friendliness-called-affability#:~:text=Thomas%20Aquinas%20speaks%20of%20a,mutual%20relations%20with%20one%20another%2C The Friendliness Called Affability], Dominican Friars</ref>}}

[[File:Gilbert Chesterton.jpg|thumb|[[G.K. Chesterton]] ]]

[[File:Gilbert Chesterton.jpg|250px|thumb|[[G.K. Chesterton]] ]]

The [[G.K. Chesterton|Chesterton]] Academy of the Holy Family article ''Affability is a Virtue'' indicates:

The [[G.K. Chesterton|Chesterton]] Academy of the Holy Family article ''Affability is a Virtue'' indicates:

{{Cquote|We are bound together, we human beings.

{{Cquote|We are bound together, we human beings.

Affability – the virtue of friendliness or agreeability. It is a kind of “mutual well-wishing” that binds a city together. It’s not quite friendship. It doesn’t have to involve any affection at all really. It’s the middle ground between being overly agreeable (flattery – being a ‘yes’ man) and being the sort to always pick a fight, even when no one wants to (quarrelsomeness). It’s when you conform yourself to those around you, to their likes, their interests, their needs, and what they want to talk about.  

Affability – the virtue of friendliness or agreeability. It is a kind of “mutual well-wishing” that binds a city together. It’s not quite friendship. It doesn’t have to involve any affection at all really. It’s the middle ground between being overly agreeable (flattery – being a ‘yes’ man) and being the sort to always pick a fight, even when no one wants to (quarrelsomeness). It’s when you conform yourself to those around you, to their likes, their interests, their needs, and what they want to talk about.  

[[Sirach]] 4:7 commands one to “make yourself affable”. Chesterton himself tells us that God’s great secret is His mirth, which every saint intuitively knows.   

Sirach 4:7 commands one to “make yourself affable”. Chesterton himself tells us that God’s great secret is His mirth, which every saint intuitively knows.   

And if we are the Chesterton Saints, then we ought to listen carefully to St. Teresa of Avila who prays that the Lord “save me from sour-faced saints”. Aristotle says, “No one could abide a day with the sad, nor with the joyless.” We don’t need any more bored, gloomy, mediocre people. We need interested, lively, joyful saints! And when we fall in the ‘awkward conversation’ mud beside the road, let us look to heaven and laugh with the same Teresa, “If this is how you treat your friends, no wonder you have so few.” [[Mother Teresa]] said, “A smile is the beginning of love.” So, let’s smile at whatever he sends our way this Saturday.<ref>[https://www.chestertonacademyoftheholyfamily.com/news/2022/3/2/the-virtue-of-affability Affability is a Virtue], Chesterton Academy of the Holy Family</ref>}}

And if we are the Chesterton Saints, then we ought to listen carefully to St. Teresa of Avila who prays that the Lord “save me from sour-faced saints”. Aristotle says, “No one could abide a day with the sad, nor with the joyless.” We don’t need any more bored, gloomy, mediocre people. We need interested, lively, joyful saints! And when we fall in the ‘awkward conversation’ mud beside the road, let us look to heaven and laugh with the same Teresa, “If this is how you treat your friends, no wonder you have so few.” [[Mother Teresa]] said, “A smile is the beginning of love.” So, let’s smile at whatever he sends our way this Saturday.<ref>[https://www.chestertonacademyoftheholyfamily.com/news/2022/3/2/the-virtue-of-affability Affability is a Virtue], Chesterton Academy of the Holy Family</ref>}}