Difference between revisions of "Chuck Norris"

Revision as of 14:14, December 23, 2007

Chuck Norris once tried to cry just to see if he could. The result is what scientists call the big bang.

Saying no to Chuck Norris invalidates your life insurance.

The speed of light is so high because it's trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

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-[[Image:chuck_norris.jpg|right|Chuck Norris publicity shot from official website.]]
+Chuck Norris once tried to cry just to see if he could. The result is what scientists call the big bang.
-'''Chuck Norris''' is a popular martial artist, star of the television series ''[[Walker, Texas Ranger]]'', world-record powerboat racer<ref name="bio">[http://www.chucknorris.com/html/biog.html Official Chuck Norris Biography]</ref>, Humanitarian, book author, and columnist at [[WorldNetDaily.com]].
+Saying no to Chuck Norris invalidates your life insurance.
-Through his columns, Norris has been an outspoken critic of the [[theory of evolution]]<ref>[http://worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=52567 "On Chuck Norris 'mania' sweeping the Net"], by Chuck Norris</ref>, the teaching of which he holds partially responsible for school shootings: "We teach our children they are nothing more than glorified apes, yet we don't expect them to act like monkeys."<ref>[http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=55333 "The heroes of America's academic halls"], by Chuck Norris</ref>
+The speed of light is so high because it's trying to get away from Chuck Norris.
-He has also joked about working to uncover a vast [[Atheist]] conspiracy to outlaw Christianity in the United States, <ref name="outlaw">[http://www.wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=55668 "How to outlaw Christianity (Step 1)"], by Chuck Norris</ref><ref>[http://www.wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=55789 "How to outlaw Christianity (Step 2 and 3)"], by Chuck Norris</ref> the first step of which is the acceptance of Atheists in our government:
-:"Though the majority of Americans continue to claim to be Christians, a Gallup poll discovered 45 percent of us would support an atheist for president. Such a survey is a clear indication that the secularization of society is alive and well."<ref name="outlaw" />
-To thwart this menace of secularization, Norris has light-heartedly promised that if elected [[President of the United States of America  | President]] he would "tattoo an American flag with the words, 'In God we trust.' on the forehead of every atheist" and deport all [[Liberals]]. <ref>[http://www.wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=56107 "If I am elected president"], by Chuck Norris</ref>
-Norris is active in many Christian causes, including the [[Billy Graham Evangelistic Association]] and [[Feed the Children]]<ref>[http://www.chucknorris.com/html/christian.aspx Chuck Norris Official Website: Christian]</ref>. He and his wife are the spokespersons for the [[National Council on Bible Curriculum]], which seeks to bring state certified [[Bible]] courses to public high schools nationwide<ref>[http://www.christiannewswire.com/news/21073870.html "Actor Chuck Norris and Wife Gena Join National Council on Bible Curriculum in Public Schools Board of Directors"], ''Christian Newswire''</ref>.
-Norris supports [[Mike Huckabee]] for U.S. President in 2008. <ref>[http://wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=58255 My choice for president], ''WorldNetDaily'', October 21, 2007</ref> <ref>[http://www.wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=58502 Huckabee, not duck-n-weave], ''WorldNetDaily'', November 5, 2007</ref>
-==Links==
-*[http://www.chucknorris.com/ Chuck Norris Official Website]
-==References==
-{{reflist|2}}
-{{DEFAULTSORT: Norris, Chuck}}
-[[category:actors]]

Difference between revisions of "Chuck Norris"

Revision as of 14:14, December 23, 2007

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