Difference between revisions of "Axis of Evil"

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States like these, and their terrorist allies, constitute an '''axis of evil''', arming to threaten the peace of the world. By seeking weapons of mass destruction, these regimes pose a grave and growing danger. They could provide these arms to terrorists, giving them the means to match their hatred. They could attack our allies or attempt to blackmail the United States. In any of these cases, the price of indifference would be catastrophic." --George W. Bush
 
States like these, and their terrorist allies, constitute an '''axis of evil''', arming to threaten the peace of the world. By seeking weapons of mass destruction, these regimes pose a grave and growing danger. They could provide these arms to terrorists, giving them the means to match their hatred. They could attack our allies or attempt to blackmail the United States. In any of these cases, the price of indifference would be catastrophic." --George W. Bush
 
 
Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis
 
of Evil" club, Libya, China and Syria announced
 
that they had formed the "Axis of Just as Evil", which
 
they said would be more evil than that stupid
 
Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of in
 
his State of the Union address. Axis of Evil members,
 
however, immediately dismissed the new Axis as having,
 
for starters, a really dumb name. "Right! They are
 
just as evil . . . in their dreams!" declared North
 
Korean leader Kim Jong-Il. "Everybody knows we're the
 
best evils . . . best at being evil . . . we're the
 
best."
 
 
Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over
 
being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if
 
they could join the original Axis of Evil. "They told
 
us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar
 
al-Assad. "An axis can't have more than three
 
countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein.
 
"This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II
 
you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the old evil
 
Axis. So, you can only have three, and a secret
 
handshake. Ours is wickedly cool."
 
 
International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil
 
declaration was swift, as within minutes, France
 
surrendered.
 
 
Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed
 
to gain triumvirate status in what has become a game
 
of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan and Serbia
 
announced that they had formed the "Axis of Somewhat
 
Evil," forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar
 
in the "Axis of Occasionally Evil," while Bulgaria,
 
Indonesia and Russia established the "Axis of Not So
 
Much Evil Really as Just Generally Disagreeable."
 
With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the
 
desirable clubs filling up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador,
 
and Rwanda applied to be called the "Axis of Countries
 
That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to
 
Host the Olympics". Canada, Mexico and Australia
 
formed the "Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite
 
Nice But Secretly Have Some Nasty Thoughts About
 
America", while Scotland, New Zealand and Spain
 
established the "Axis of Countries That Want Sheep to
 
Wear Lipstick." "That's not a threat, really, just
 
something we like to do," said Scottish Executive
 
First Minister Jack McConnell.
 
 
While wondering if the other nations of the world
 
weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush
 
granted approval for most axes, although he rejected
 
the establishment of the "Axis of Countries Whose
 
Names End in 'Guay'", accusing one of its members of
 
filing a false application. Officials from Paraguay,
 
Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges.
 
 
Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any
 
Axis, but privately world leaders said that's only
 
because no one asked them.
 

Revision as of 04:15, March 31, 2007

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The Axis of Evil was mentioned in a President George W. Bush's State of the Union address in January 28th, 2002. The Axis of Evil was a reference to the governments of Iran, Iraq and North Korea.

"Our goal is to prevent regimes that sponsor terror from threatening America or our friends and allies with weapons of mass destruction. Some of these regimes have been pretty quiet since September the 11th. But we know their true nature. North Korea is a regime arming with missiles and weapons of mass destruction, while starving its citizens.

Iran aggressively pursues these weapons and exports terror, while an unelected few repress the Iranian people's hope for freedom.

Iraq continues to flaunt its hostility toward America and to support terror. The Iraqi regime has plotted to develop anthrax, and nerve gas, and nuclear weapons for over a decade. This is a regime that has already used poison gas to murder thousands of its own citizens—leaving the bodies of mothers huddled over their dead children. This is a regime that agreed to international inspections—then kicked out the inspectors. This is a regime that has something to hide from the civilized world.

States like these, and their terrorist allies, constitute an axis of evil, arming to threaten the peace of the world. By seeking weapons of mass destruction, these regimes pose a grave and growing danger. They could provide these arms to terrorists, giving them the means to match their hatred. They could attack our allies or attempt to blackmail the United States. In any of these cases, the price of indifference would be catastrophic." --George W. Bush