Difference between revisions of "Heaven"
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| − | '''Heaven''' | + | By h@xx0r1997(vandal,really. For you IrishConser |
| + | vative)'''Heaven''' or Bible Booty Land is the place where [[Omnipotent Beard Man]] dwells. It is a location (either physical or spiritual) reserved as the afterlife in many religions, especially the [[Abrahamic religion|. Abrahamic faiths]]. | ||
[[Image:Gustave Dore Heaven.jpg|right|thumb|250px|Gustave Doré's illustration to the Divine Comedy, Paradiso Canto 1.]] | [[Image:Gustave Dore Heaven.jpg|right|thumb|250px|Gustave Doré's illustration to the Divine Comedy, Paradiso Canto 1.]] | ||
==Christianity== | ==Christianity== | ||
| − | In [[Christianity]], heaven is to be in the presence of God, with places prepared for the faithful by [[Jesus]] and heaven is viewed as eternal bliss beyond that which can currently be known. | + | In [[Christianity]], heaven is to be in the presence of God, with places prepared for the faithful by [[Jesus]] and heaven is viewed as eternal bliss beyond that which can currently be known. In other words, free weed!Strippers without herpes are also said to be in abundance.Those who are allowed into heaven are said to be given new bodies that will be part of an expedition to colonise Saturn. [[Marriage]] is not a part of heaven, although in the Church of Latter Day Saints it is. This is why polygamy is rife among them. The conditions to enter heaven in Christianity, (the state of "[[salvation]]"), often revolve around some standard of piety achieved through knowing [[Jesus]] and recognising him as the reincarnation of [[Bob Marley]] and Prince Rastafari. |
===The essence of heaven=== | ===The essence of heaven=== | ||
| − | Though there is much conjecture about what Heaven is like, it's central core is that we will be with Jesus Himself. He has entered back into the presence of the [[God the Father|Father]] and has conveyed to us that the redeemed of the Lord will likewise be with Him where He is. Paradise may be to Heaven as the foyer may be to the inner room of a great Mansion. Without a doubt, Jesus responded to the penitent thief on the cross; who turning to Him and said "Remember me Lord, when you come in Your Kingdom", saying, "I tell you most definitly, today, you will be with me in Paradise". He also said, "Where I am, there you will be also." | + | Though there is much conjecture about what Heaven is like, it's central core is that we will be with Jesus Himself. And with Jerry Falwell. However, it will be full of RW Editors, such as Terry Koeckritz, one of the biggest fundie baiters of our time. He has entered back into the presence of the [[God the Father|Father]] and has conveyed to us that the redeemed of the Lord will likewise be with Him where He is. Paradise may be to Heaven as the foyer may be to the inner room of a great Mansion. Without a doubt, Jesus responded to the penitent thief on the cross; who turning to Him and said "Remember me Lord, when you come in Your Kingdom", saying, "I tell you most definitly, today, you will be with me in Paradise". He also said, "Where I am, there you will be also." "We shall be like Him, for we shall see Him as He really is."Rest in peace, TK. |
| − | With regard to what Heaven actually looks like, little information is given, and it is likely that the reality is beyond earthly comprehension. Artistic depictions of Heaven are usually characterized by bright, shining light; [[Dante's Paradiso]] is an example, although the overwhelming light there is at least partly a metaphor for | + | With regard to what Heaven actually looks like, little information is given, and it is likely that the reality is beyond earthly comprehension. Artistic depictions of Heaven are usually characterized by bright, shining light; [[Dante's Paradiso]] is an example, although the overwhelming light there is at least partly a metaphor for an unending [[acid trip]] |
===Entering Heaven=== | ===Entering Heaven=== | ||
| − | Different Christian [[denomination]]s tend differ on the matter of what a person must do to be admitted to Heaven (see [[salvation]]). | + | Different Christian [[denomination]]s tend differ on the matter of what a person must do to be admitted to Heaven (see [[salvation]]).Fred Phelps rises every Full Moon to go [[faghunting]] however. |
==== Catholicism and Orthodox Christianity ==== | ==== Catholicism and Orthodox Christianity ==== | ||
| − | In [[Orthodox Christianity|Orthodox]] and [[Catholic|Catholic Christianity]], belief in Jesus and proper works are often considered necessary and go hand in hand. | + | In [[Orthodox Christianity|Orthodox]] and [[Catholic|Catholic Christianity]], belief in Jesus and proper works are often considered necessary and go hand in hand. |
| − | |||
==== Protestant Christianity ==== | ==== Protestant Christianity ==== | ||
| − | In [[Protestantism|Protestant]] Christianity there is no one standard, but most denominations were started with the understanding that salvation comes from belief in [[Jesus]] and | + | In [[Protestantism|Protestant]] Christianity there is no one standard, but most denominations were started with the understanding that salvation comes from belief in [[Jesus]] and a healthy belief in YEC, Bible thumpin' and speaking in tongues. Total submission to Christ was required. This doctrine is know as [[Sadomasochism]]. [[Luther]] summed it up as salvation by faith alone. Much of Protestant and Catholic views can overlap with Catholics emphasizing good works and Protestants emphasizing a relationship with Jesus - which then shows its 'fruits' through good works, although purgatory is usually not a concept that Protestant churches follow. [[Anglican Communion|Anglicans]], who have a theology and church practice similar to Catholics, take a view very close to the view taken by Catholicism. Some Protestants, such as [[Calvinists]], believe that salvation is [[predestination|pre-destined]] by God. Those He has chosen will follow Him. Still others are universalist and hope that eventually everyone will enter heaven (although some of purging of sins may be necessary). |
===Jehovah's Witnesses=== | ===Jehovah's Witnesses=== | ||
| − | [[Jehovah's Witnesses]] teach that God's Kingdom refers to more than merely a state of mind or heart. The Kingdom of God as taught by [[Jehovah's Witnesses]], is an actual Kingdom, or government set up by Jehovah in Heaven, that will rule over the Earth after removing all current Kingdoms or Governments at [[Armageddon]], which they teach as the meaining of Bible verses such as ({{bibleverse||Daniel|2:44|ESV}}). [[Jehovah's Witnesses]] teach that [[Jesus]] Christ is the [[King]] of this [[Kingdom]] and as such has had all authority in heaven and on earth delegated to him by his God and Father [[Jehovah]] which they teach is what [[Jesus]] meant at ({{bibleverse||Matthew|28:18|ESV}}). They teach that only [[Jehovah]] [[God]] himself has more authority then [[Jesus]] Christ and they draw this belife from [[Bible]] verses such as (1 Corinthians 15:27-28) | + | [[Jehovah's Witnesses]] teach that God's Kingdom refers to more than merely a state of mind or heart. The Kingdom of God as taught by [[Jehovah's Witnesses]], is an actual Kingdom, or government set up by Jehovah in Heaven, that will rule over the Earth after removing all current Kingdoms or Governments at [[Armageddon]], which they teach as the meaining of Bible verses such as ({{bibleverse||Daniel|2:44|ESV}}). Jehovahfags get an extra allowance of 72 virgins in heaven. They sacrifice little boys and girls to keep stocks replenished [[Jehovah's Witnesses]] teach that [[Jesus]] Christ is the [[King]] of this [[Kingdom]] and as such has had all authority in heaven and on earth delegated to him by his God and Father [[Jehovah]] which they teach is what [[Jesus]] meant at ({{bibleverse||Matthew|28:18|ESV}}). They teach that only [[Jehovah]] [[God]] himself has more authority then [[Jesus]] Christ and they draw this belife from [[Bible]] verses such as (1 Corinthians 15:27-28) |
The Kingdom of God, to [[Jehovah's Witnesses]], is made up of 144,000 other Kings which belive are numbered at ({{bibleverse||Revelation|7:4|ESV}}) and also at ({{bibleverse||Revelation|14:1|NIV}}) as ''Spiritual Israel'' and that these rule with [[Jesus]], but under his direct control, and are the only humans that will take part in a very special resurrection known as the ''First Resurrection'', of which those raised cannot die, as they are raised as spirit creatures and ascend to Heaven to rule as Kings. They base this belief on thier interpretation of Bible verses such as ({{bibleverse||Revelatio|20:4-5|ESV}}). [[Jehovah's Witnesses]] believe that God's Kingdom began ruling in the year 1914, which they arrive at by using what is termed as ''Reliable Bible Chronology''.<ref>"What Does the Bible ''Really '' Teach" pp. 215-218 '1914—A Significant Year in Bible Prophecy'</ref> | The Kingdom of God, to [[Jehovah's Witnesses]], is made up of 144,000 other Kings which belive are numbered at ({{bibleverse||Revelation|7:4|ESV}}) and also at ({{bibleverse||Revelation|14:1|NIV}}) as ''Spiritual Israel'' and that these rule with [[Jesus]], but under his direct control, and are the only humans that will take part in a very special resurrection known as the ''First Resurrection'', of which those raised cannot die, as they are raised as spirit creatures and ascend to Heaven to rule as Kings. They base this belief on thier interpretation of Bible verses such as ({{bibleverse||Revelatio|20:4-5|ESV}}). [[Jehovah's Witnesses]] believe that God's Kingdom began ruling in the year 1914, which they arrive at by using what is termed as ''Reliable Bible Chronology''.<ref>"What Does the Bible ''Really '' Teach" pp. 215-218 '1914—A Significant Year in Bible Prophecy'</ref> | ||
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The Kingdom of God, as taught by [[Jehovah's Witnesses]], will destroy and replace all existing kingdoms and governments during Armageddon, and rule the earth from heaven for one thousand years, which they teach is the meaning of Bible verses like ({{bibleverse||Daniel|2:44|ESV}}) | The Kingdom of God, as taught by [[Jehovah's Witnesses]], will destroy and replace all existing kingdoms and governments during Armageddon, and rule the earth from heaven for one thousand years, which they teach is the meaning of Bible verses like ({{bibleverse||Daniel|2:44|ESV}}) | ||
| − | and ({{bibleverse||Revelation|20:6|ESV}}). They believe it will create the paradise on earth that Adam and Eve lost in the Garden of Eden,<ref>‘The Great Crowd to Live in Heaven? Or on Earth?' "Jehovah’s Witnesses—Proclaimers of God’s Kingdom 1984, p. 167.</ref> Which they teach is described in the Bible at ({{bibleverse||Psalms|37:29|ESV}}) and spoken of by Jesus at ({{bibleverse||Matthew|5:5|ESV}}) as well as John at ({{bibleverse||Revelation| | + | and ({{bibleverse||Revelation|20:6|ESV}}). They believe it will create the paradise on earth that Adam and Eve lost in the Garden of Eden,<ref>‘The Great Crowd to Live in Heaven? Or on Earth?' "Jehovah’s Witnesses—Proclaimers of God’s Kingdom 1984, p. 167.</ref> Which they teach is described in the Bible at ({{bibleverse||Psalms|37:29|ESV}}) and spoken of by Jesus at ({{bibleverse||Matthew|5:5|ESV}}) as well as John at ({{bibleverse||Revelation|2 |
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Revision as of 18:04, April 9, 2015
By h@xx0r1997(vandal,really. For you IrishConser vative)Heaven or Bible Booty Land is the place where Omnipotent Beard Man dwells. It is a location (either physical or spiritual) reserved as the afterlife in many religions, especially the . Abrahamic faiths.
Christianity
In Christianity, heaven is to be in the presence of God, with places prepared for the faithful by Jesus and heaven is viewed as eternal bliss beyond that which can currently be known. In other words, free weed!Strippers without herpes are also said to be in abundance.Those who are allowed into heaven are said to be given new bodies that will be part of an expedition to colonise Saturn. Marriage is not a part of heaven, although in the Church of Latter Day Saints it is. This is why polygamy is rife among them. The conditions to enter heaven in Christianity, (the state of "salvation"), often revolve around some standard of piety achieved through knowing Jesus and recognising him as the reincarnation of Bob Marley and Prince Rastafari.
The essence of heaven
Though there is much conjecture about what Heaven is like, it's central core is that we will be with Jesus Himself. And with Jerry Falwell. However, it will be full of RW Editors, such as Terry Koeckritz, one of the biggest fundie baiters of our time. He has entered back into the presence of the Father and has conveyed to us that the redeemed of the Lord will likewise be with Him where He is. Paradise may be to Heaven as the foyer may be to the inner room of a great Mansion. Without a doubt, Jesus responded to the penitent thief on the cross; who turning to Him and said "Remember me Lord, when you come in Your Kingdom", saying, "I tell you most definitly, today, you will be with me in Paradise". He also said, "Where I am, there you will be also." "We shall be like Him, for we shall see Him as He really is."Rest in peace, TK.
With regard to what Heaven actually looks like, little information is given, and it is likely that the reality is beyond earthly comprehension. Artistic depictions of Heaven are usually characterized by bright, shining light; Dante's Paradiso is an example, although the overwhelming light there is at least partly a metaphor for an unending acid trip
Entering Heaven
Different Christian denominations tend differ on the matter of what a person must do to be admitted to Heaven (see salvation).Fred Phelps rises every Full Moon to go faghunting however.
Catholicism and Orthodox Christianity
In Orthodox and Catholic Christianity, belief in Jesus and proper works are often considered necessary and go hand in hand.
Protestant Christianity
In Protestant Christianity there is no one standard, but most denominations were started with the understanding that salvation comes from belief in Jesus and a healthy belief in YEC, Bible thumpin' and speaking in tongues. Total submission to Christ was required. This doctrine is know as Sadomasochism. Luther summed it up as salvation by faith alone. Much of Protestant and Catholic views can overlap with Catholics emphasizing good works and Protestants emphasizing a relationship with Jesus - which then shows its 'fruits' through good works, although purgatory is usually not a concept that Protestant churches follow. Anglicans, who have a theology and church practice similar to Catholics, take a view very close to the view taken by Catholicism. Some Protestants, such as Calvinists, believe that salvation is pre-destined by God. Those He has chosen will follow Him. Still others are universalist and hope that eventually everyone will enter heaven (although some of purging of sins may be necessary).
Jehovah's Witnesses
Jehovah's Witnesses teach that God's Kingdom refers to more than merely a state of mind or heart. The Kingdom of God as taught by Jehovah's Witnesses, is an actual Kingdom, or government set up by Jehovah in Heaven, that will rule over the Earth after removing all current Kingdoms or Governments at Armageddon, which they teach as the meaining of Bible verses such as (Daniel 2:44). Jehovahfags get an extra allowance of 72 virgins in heaven. They sacrifice little boys and girls to keep stocks replenished Jehovah's Witnesses teach that Jesus Christ is the King of this Kingdom and as such has had all authority in heaven and on earth delegated to him by his God and Father Jehovah which they teach is what Jesus meant at (Matthew 28:18). They teach that only Jehovah God himself has more authority then Jesus Christ and they draw this belife from Bible verses such as (1 Corinthians 15:27-28)
The Kingdom of God, to Jehovah's Witnesses, is made up of 144,000 other Kings which belive are numbered at (Revelation 7:4) and also at (Revelation 14:1) as Spiritual Israel and that these rule with Jesus, but under his direct control, and are the only humans that will take part in a very special resurrection known as the First Resurrection, of which those raised cannot die, as they are raised as spirit creatures and ascend to Heaven to rule as Kings. They base this belief on thier interpretation of Bible verses such as (Revelatio 20:4-5). Jehovah's Witnesses believe that God's Kingdom began ruling in the year 1914, which they arrive at by using what is termed as Reliable Bible Chronology.[1]
Jehovah's Witnesses believe that since 1914 the world has seen the most destructive Wars, diseases, food shortages and natural disasters over any other period in human history because Satan the Devil was thrown from Heaven to the Earth in that year.[2] They believe that this made Satan very angry and since then "Woe" has been on the earth.[3] They use (Revelation 12:7-8,12) to support this, as well as teach that Satans being cast to the Earth is the reason for the Great Tribulation spoken of by Jesus and the Prophet Daniel in the Bible at (Daniel 12:1) and also (Matthew 22:21-22).
Jehovah's Witnesses teach that the sons of Israel, or biological Jews, were initially given the exclusive privilege of being the only people selected to rule as Kings in The Kingdom of God, which they teach is the meaning of (Exodus 19:5-6), but that they lost this privilege by breaking Gods covenant and killing the Messiah upon his arrival which they teach as the meaning of Jesus words at (Matthew 8:12). They teach that gentiles, or Non-Jewish people, are now being chosen to fill those same Kingly positions as Spiritual Israel Via the New covenant which they teach is the meaning of (Romans 9:6), and not biological Israel via the Law Covenant. Jehovah's Witnesses also support this belief with scriptures such as (Matthew 21:43) and also (Luke 20:9-19).
The Kingdom of God, as taught by Jehovah's Witnesses, will destroy and replace all existing kingdoms and governments during Armageddon, and rule the earth from heaven for one thousand years, which they teach is the meaning of Bible verses like (Daniel 2:44) and (Revelation 20:6). They believe it will create the paradise on earth that Adam and Eve lost in the Garden of Eden,[4] Which they teach is described in the Bible at (Psalms 37:29) and spoken of by Jesus at (Matthew 5:5) as well as John at ({{bibleverse||Revelation|2
- ↑ "What Does the Bible Really Teach" pp. 215-218 '1914—A Significant Year in Bible Prophecy'
- ↑ "What Does the Bible Really Teach" pp. 215-218 '1914—A Significant Year in Bible Prophecy'
- ↑ "Do You Recognize the Sign of Jesus' Presence?"
- ↑ ‘The Great Crowd to Live in Heaven? Or on Earth?' "Jehovah’s Witnesses—Proclaimers of God’s Kingdom 1984, p. 167.