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| − | : ''This article discusses the Biblical sense of the word "judge." For an ordinary judge, see [[Judge]].''
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| − | [[Image:Gideon300.jpg|thumb|400px|right|Judge [[Gideon]] chooses his three hundred soldiers]]A '''Judge''' ([[Hebrew]] '''שֹֽׁפְטִ֑''' ''shâphat'', pl. '''שֹֽׁפְטִ֑ים''' ''shâphatim'') was a special leader of the people of [[Israel]], who appeared at a time of great national distress to convict the people of their [[sin]], deliver them from oppression or other external threat, and, while he lived, administer justice according to [[God]]'s law. ({{Bible ref|book=Judges|chap=2|verses=16-23}})
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| − | == Functions and duties of a Judge ==
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| − | A biblical Judge had duties beyond those of a modern [[judge]], and even beyond those of a national chief justice. The careers of the judges of the [[Bible]] had three phases, and in each phase the judge discharged one of his three primary duties.
| + | MAKING LOVE |
| | + | AMERICAN MADE |
| | + | BUILT FORD TOUGH |
| | + | TWO BEAUTIFUL MURDER MACHINES |
| | + | AMERICAN ANGELS IN THE SKY |
| | + | GROWN MEN CRY |
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| − | === Conviction ===
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| − | The first task that a Biblical judge had to perform was to convict the people of their sins. The sin in question here was a national or collective sin: turning away from God and worshiping other gods. These other gods were usually the local agricultural and fertility cults that were rife in [[Canaan (land)|Canaan]], and included [[Baal]] and [[Asherah]], aka Ashtoreth, aka Astarte. The modern equivalent of this sin would be the elevation in the individual or public consciousness of any [[God-substitute]], or the elevation of [[human|man]] as his own god, as the "captain of his soul," as [[Timothy McVeigh]] described himself before he suffered execution.
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| − | A judge would measure his success by the genuine repentance of the people, and the demonstration of that repentance by their actions in putting away all their foreign gods and [[God-substitute]]s and serving the True [[God]] alone.
| + | Two trucks, having sex (oh yes) |
| | + | Two trucks, having sex (oh yes) |
| | + | my muscles (UH) my muscles (UH) |
| | + | Involuntarily flex |
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| − | === Deliverance ===
| + | RIGHT BY MY SIDE |
| − | Once the judge had accomplished the first task, he could usually be sure of achieving the second. God always returned to deliver His people when they returned to Him. The deliverance, or liberation, was usually from a threat from a foreign power. The threat varied from raiding and pillaging to the exacting of tribute to actual invasion and occupation or, in the original case, slavery.
| + | THERE'S ZZ TOP |
| | + | AND ROBERT Z'DAR |
| | + | FROM MANIAC COP 1, 2 and 3 |
| | + | THIS BARBECUE COULD BRING YOU TO YOUR KNEES |
| | + | AND SO COULD THESE TWO TRUCKS |
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| − | === Administration ===
| + | Two trucks holding hands |
| − | Once the judge had achieved deliverance, he would administer justice and keep the people focused on serving God alone for as long as he lived. This was a very difficult task, and not all of the celebrated Biblical judges performed this to Divine satisfaction. To be effective, the judge had to set a good example in his personal conduct in addition to judging cases fairly and honestly and in a Godly fashion.
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| | + | The passion, the passion |
| | + | Is more than I can withstand |
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| − | == Chronology ==
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| − | The period of the Judges begins properly with the [[Exodus of Israel]] in 15 Abib 2513 AM (12 April 1491 BC), because [[Moses]], and not [[Othniel]] as most Bible readers suppose, is actually the first judge. It ends with the death of [[Samuel]] in 2944 AM (1060 BC). Samuel was the last of the judges. He introduced the [[United Kingdom of Israel]] and anointed its first two kings, [[Saul]] and [[David]]. | + | Two trucks holding hands |
| | + | The passion, the passion |
| | + | My big fat heart expands |
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| − | [[Floyd Nolen Jones]], in [[The Chronology of the Old Testament]], has determined that the lengths of the careers of the Judges are the same as the lengths that most people suppose that "the land had rest." [[James Ussher]] ([[The Annals of the World]]) worked out a somewhat different chronology, but did not adequately account for one key fact: that [[Jephthah]]'s great battle against the [[Ammon]]ites occurred exactly three hundred years after the conquest of [[Heshbon]] from Sihon the Amorite in the fall of 2553 AM (1452 BC), as Jephthah specifically stated in his communiqué to the Ammonites. ({{Bible ref|book=Judges|chap=11|verses=12-28}}) Jones also points out that [[Samson]]'s awesome revenge against the [[Philistines]] must have occurred near the end of the Philistines' forty-year dominion over Israel, and that the [[Battle of Mizpah]], in which [[Samuel]] rallied the Israelites to annihilate a Philistine force sent against them, must have occurred immediately after that event ''and'' twenty years after the [[ark of the covenant]] was returned to Israel after the Philistines had captured it.
| + | TWO PICKUP TRUCKS |
| | + | ONE CYLINDER BLOCK |
| | + | CRUSH MY BODY LIKE A ROCK |
| | + | SO BEAUTIFUL |
| | + | NO STARS TONIGHT |
| | + | JUST FIREWORKS AND EAGLES IN THE SKY |
| | + | THE FOUNDING FATHERS CRY |
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| − | == Names ==
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| − | The line of the Judges begins with [[Moses]] and his immediate successor [[Joshua (Biblical leader)|Joshua]], because both men performed all three functions of biblical Judges. The careers of the remaining Judges are described in the [[Book of Judges]], except for [[Eli]] and [[Samuel]], whose careers are described in [[I Samuel]].
| + | Two trucks having sex (oh yes) |
| | + | my muscles (UH) my muscles (UH) |
| | + | Involuntarily flex |
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| − | [[Abimelech]] is not considered a Judge, because he was a tyrant and a fratricide. Nevertheless, his name appears in most lists of the Judges of Israel.
| + | Two trucks, having sex (oh yes) |
| | + | Two trucks, having sex (oh yes) |
| | + | my muscles (UH) my muscles (UH) |
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| − | == Bible record ==
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| − | * {{Bible ref|book=Judges|chap=1-21}}
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| − | == References ==
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| − | * [[Floyd Nolen Jones]], ''[[The Chronology of the Old Testament]]'', Green Forest, AR: Master Books, 2004, pp. 71–104 and Charts 4, 4A, and 4B.
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| − | * [[James Ussher]], ''The Annals of the World'', Green Forest, AR: Master Books, 2003, pghh. 342-391
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| − | == See also ==
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| − | * [[Israel]]
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| − | {{nb Judges}}
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| − | [[Category:Bible]]
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| − | [[Category:Bible Study]]
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| − | [[Category:Biblical Persons]]
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| − | [[Category:Israel]]
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| − | [[Category:Judges]]
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| − | [[Category:Old Testament]]
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Two trucks having sex
Two trucks having sex
My muscles, my muscles
Involuntarily flex
Two trucks having sex
Two trucks having sex
My muscles, my muscles
Involuntarily flex
TWO PICKUP TRUCKS
MAKING LOVE
AMERICAN MADE
BUILT FORD TOUGH
TWO BEAUTIFUL MURDER MACHINES
AMERICAN ANGELS IN THE SKY
GROWN MEN CRY
Two trucks having sex (oh yes)
Two trucks having sex (oh yes)
My muscles (UH) My muscles (UH)
Involuntarily flex
Two trucks, having sex (oh yes)
Two trucks, having sex (oh yes)
my muscles (UH) my muscles (UH)
Involuntarily flex
RIGHT BY MY SIDE
THERE'S ZZ TOP
AND ROBERT Z'DAR
FROM MANIAC COP 1, 2 and 3
THIS BARBECUE COULD BRING YOU TO YOUR KNEES
AND SO COULD THESE TWO TRUCKS
Two trucks holding hands
Two trucks holding hands
The passion, the passion
Is more than I can withstand
Two trucks holding hands
Two trucks holding hands
The passion, the passion
My big fat heart expands
TWO PICKUP TRUCKS
ONE CYLINDER BLOCK
CRUSH MY BODY LIKE A ROCK
SO BEAUTIFUL
NO STARS TONIGHT
JUST FIREWORKS AND EAGLES IN THE SKY
THE FOUNDING FATHERS CRY
Two trucks having sex (oh yes)
Two trucks having sex (oh yes)
my muscles (UH) my muscles (UH)
Involuntarily flex
Two trucks, having sex (oh yes)
Two trucks, having sex (oh yes)
my muscles (UH) my muscles (UH)
Involuntarily flex
Two trucks having sex
Two trucks having sex
My muscles, my muscles
Involuntarily flex
Two trucks having sex
Two trucks having sex
My muscles, my muscles
Involuntarily flex
Two trucks (having sex)
Two trucks (having sex)
Two trucks (having sex, having sex, having sex)
Two trucks (having sex)
Two trucks (having sex)
Two trucks (having sex, having sex, having sex)