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Line 1: − <big><big><big><b>You who will block me whoever you are, please try and get the message to Andrew Schlafly. This wiki needs more truth and less conservative deceit. That way tey vandals will respect the site more and vandalize less. Really, I mean it!</b></big></big></big>+ + − <big>'''ROCK OPERA FOR ANDY SCHLAFLY'''</big>+ − [[Image:ASchlafly.JPG|thumb|center|HAPPY BIRFDAY]] − <center>CHORUS:<br>+ − He is teh Assfly! Teh Assfly!<br> − Be careful if you get him pissed!<br> − Ass! Teh Assfly!<br> − He’ll smite you with home schooling fists!<br> − Writing all he can, he’s just an ass,<br> − a wiki-er of words making a mess!<br> − He went to Harvard Law,<br> − he’s dull, a major flaw<br> − Born in 1961, weaned in 1994!<br> − He is teh Assfly!<br> − <br> − NARRATOR (Spoken):<br>+ − Oh look, but there he is, what will he say?<br> − <br> − TEH ASSFLY:<br>+ − I’m a lonely Schlafly, a lonely Schlafly from Phyl!<br> − I wonder what I’ll write about? I think I’ll write about gays!<br> − <br> − CHORUS:<br>+ − Assfly! Assfly! Assfly!<br> − <br> − TEH ASSFLY:<br>+ − I don't know what's wrong with me, I think I've turned into a bug!<br> − I see Bugler! What? I see I think I’ve turned into a bug!<br> − I ain't got no common sense, I think I've turned into a bug!<br> − Bet you fifty dollars I'm a man, I'm a lawyer, and I've turned into a bug!<br> − Phyllis like my daddy, I'm her baby, still a baby, like I've turned into a bug!<br> − Yeah! Yeah!<br> − <br> − CHORUS:<br>+ − He is teh Assfly!<br> − <br> − TEH ASSFLY:<br>+ − Living like an ass ain't easy!<br>+ − My Wiki don't seem to need me!<br>+ − It's gathered up all these huge jerks,<br>+ − I don't really know 'bout their work<br>+ − I don't want no vandalizing,<br>+ − No, I'm just not sympathizing!<br>+ − Living like an ass ain't easy!<br>+ − Living like an ass ain't easy!<br>+ − <br>+ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + − JIMBO WALES (Spoken):<br>+ − Welcome to Wikipedia, Assfly! My name is Jimbo! I don't think you're going to like it here!<br> − <br> − CHORUS:<br>+ − He is teh Assfly!<br>+ − </center>+ + − [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uaaF83eVig&feature=related With apologies to ''Home Movies'']<br>+ − [http://www.math.sc.edu/~olmoj/heisfranzkafka.html Lyrics]+ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +
Reverted edits by PeterTh (Talk) to last version by Joaquín Martínez
{{Bible}}
The '''New Testament''' is a collection of biblical books written by various authors between 45 AD and 100 AD, revolving around the life and work of [[Jesus]] of Nazareth and His apostles, as well as the history of the early church.
The books are traditionally classified into categories:
*The four [[Gospel]]s (literally "Good news"): [[Alleged Bible contradictions|varying]] accounts of the life and ministry of [[Jesus]], consisting of the gospels attributed to [[Saint Matthew|Matthew]], [[Gospel of Mark|Mark]], [[Luke]], and [[John the Apostle|John]].
*[[The Acts of the Apostles]] (or just "Acts") (which J. B. Phillips evocatively called "The Young Church In Action,") which concerns the ministry of the Apostles after the death of Christ. It is similar in language and style to, and reads as a continuation of, the Gospel of [[Luke]].
*[[The Epistles]] (which J. B. Phillips called "Letters to Young Churches,") ''Romans'' through ''Jude'', consisting of fourteen letters attributed to St. Paul and seven by other writers including James, [[Saint Peter|Peter]], John, and Jude. The writer of Hebrews is unknown.
*[[The Book of Revelation]] (or just "Revelation,") the prophetic book which ends the New Testament. It is also known as "the Apocalypse" (Greek for 'revelation'). It is somewhat similar in style to the [[Old Testament]] book of [[Daniel]] (and indeed weaves common prophecy), and tells of the end of the world, including [[Armageddon]], Judgment Day, and the arrival of the Kingdom of Heaven. Despite Jesus' thrice repeated promise in it that 'I shall come very soon', opinions vary as to whether it refers to imminent events set amid the then Roman Empire or to the far future.
As with the Old Testament, the chapter and verse divisions of the various books are not original, but were added in medieval times for greater understanding.
The oldest books in the New Testament are the letters of [[Paul]], or possibly the book of [[St. James the Less|James]].
==Books of the New Testament Canon==
[[Image:Rylands papyrus verso.jpg|thumb|Rylands papyrus, verso, (P52); containing on the one side part of St. John's Gospel verses 31-33, on the other of verses 37-38 of chapter xviii.]]
*[[Gospel of Matthew]]
*[[Gospel of Mark]]
*[[Gospel of Luke]]
*[[Gospel of John]]
*[[Acts of the Apostles]]
*[[Epistle to the Romans]]
*[[First Epistle to the Corinthians]]
*[[Second Epistle to the Corinthians]]
*[[Epistle to the Galatians]]
*[[Epistle to the Ephesians]]
*[[Epistle to the Philippians]]
*[[Epistle to the Colossians]]
*[[First Epistle to the Thessalonians]]
*[[Second Epistle to the Thessalonians]]
*[[First Epistle to Timothy]]
*[[Second Epistle to Timothy]]
*[[Epistle to Titus]]
*[[Epistle to Philemon]]
*[[Epistle to the Hebrews]]
*[[Epistle of James]]
*[[First Epistle of Peter]]
*[[Second Epistle of Peter]]
*[[First Epistle of John]]
*[[Second Epistle of John]]
*[[Third Epistle of John]]
*[[Epistle of Jude]]
*[[Book of Revelation|Revelation]]
== See also ==
*[[The Twelve Apostles]]
*[[Virgin Mary]]
*[[New Testament understanding through the Jewish perspective]]
*[[Famous Bible paintings]]
==References==
==References==
<references/>
==Sources==
* Cruden, A., ''Complete Concordance to the Old and New Testaments'' (Lutterworth, 1930)
* Cross, C., ''Who Was Jesus?'' (Hodder & Stoughton, 1970)
* ''The Holy Bible'' (King James Version)
* James, M. R., ''The Apocryphal New Testament'' (Clarendon, Oxford, 1953)
* ''The New English Bible'' (Oxford & Cambridge University Presses, 1970)
* ''The New Jerusalem Bible'' (Darton, Longman & Todd, 1990)
* Lemesurier, P., ''The Armageddon Script'' (Element Books, 1981)
* Peake, A. S., ''Commentary on the Bible'' (Nelson, 1962)
* Schonfield, H. J., ''The Authentic New Testament'' (Dobson, n.d.)
* Schonfield, H. J., ''The Passover Plot'' (Hutchinson, 1965)
* Schonfield, H. J., ''The Pentecost Revolution'' (Macdonald, 1974)
* Schonfield, H. J., ''Those Incredible Christians'' (Bernard Geis, New York, 1968)
* Vermes, G., ''Jesus the Jew'' (Collins, 1973)
* Young, R., ''Analytical Concordance to the Holy Bible'' (Lutterworth, 1939)
[[Category:Christianity]]
[[Category:New Testament| ]]