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He is deeply disliked by many on the [[leftist|far-left]].{{fact}}
He is deeply disliked by many on the [[leftist|far-left]].{{fact}}
==2005 Phone Sex Scandal ==
The practice of having phone sex was pioneered by Bill O’Reilly. In the segment, [[Big Bird]] read from a transcript of the phone sex call. Disseminating words of caring sensitivity, O'Reilly instructed Ann, saying "Now, put the falafel inside you... Yeah, now purr like a kitty for me... That's it. Now, whore, paper cut your nipples off and eat them." Being the fair, balanced, and judicious man that he is, he then instructed Ann Coulter to "spread [her] sloppy joe butt cheeks so [he] could stick [his] head as far up [her] butt as humanly possible."
Unfortunately, O'Reilly's head got stuck in his own butt, which he was pretending was Ann's butt. O'Reilly remained stuck for two days as his family was visiting relatives in Vermont. Although he was in the centre of time square during this ordeal, he was essentially invisible since his body is composed 99.9% of his big head. [[Bob Saget]], Bill's guest hosted O'Reilly's show during the crisis. On taking over the show again, Bill told the story in explicit detail. He explained that this "near-death experience" had somehow inspired him deeply. The program was rebroadcast at 4 P.M., the following day for the "unfortunate children" who had to retire early the night prior.
As the result of his near death experience, he began having a period from his own butthole. He started to shove tampons up his butt and he also began wearing women's panties.
Since then, O'Reilly and Coulter have gone on to produce and star in their very own, commercially successful, pornographic film, [[Coulter Warrior: Claiming That Ass for America]]. It is reportedly inspired by the real life events that preceded it. Mrs. O'Reilly, when asked about whether or not she has seen the film that has, as [[Roger Ebert]] put it, "raped the eyes of the nation," replied, "No comment."
== Enemies ==
* [[Bruno]]
* [[Common sense]]
* Social liberalism
* [[Feminazis]]
* [[Keith Olbermann|
* [[Democrats|Communist Party]]
* [[French|The French]]
* [[Michael Savage]]
* [[Muslims]]
* [[Richard Dawkins]]
* [[Michael Moore]] ''
* [[Holocaust|Holocaust survivors]]
* [[Gandhi]]
* [[Judaism|Jews]]
* [[Palestine]]
* [[Mexico]]
* [[Canadians]]
* Jon Benet Ramsey
* [[Jon Stewart]]
* [[Stephen Colbert]]
* [[Black People]]
* [[Poor people|The Underprivileged]]
* [[Hippies]]
* [[Hillary Clinton]]
* [[Democracy]]
* [[Martin Luther King Jr.]]
* [[Homosexuals]]
* His 4th grade English teacher
* Anyone with an education or a degree
* [[San Francisco]]
* Fairness
* Educated Opinions
* Logic
* [[Bart Simpson]]
* [[Nancy Pelosi]]
* Barney Frank
* [[Sean Penn]]
* Any combination of the above
==Trivia==
==Trivia==