Lysander

Ron Paul

Ron Paul is Lysander's best friend forever. Some neopostmodernclassicalistpostBoomers would say, "BFF."

Whoa, back it up! Ron Paul factoids!

   * If Ron Paul were a comedian, he would kill us all with laughter by
     literally splitting our sides open.
   * The Pentagon once had 6 sides...until Ron Paul got his hands on it.
   * Ron Paul's didn't design the Vietnam memorial, but he carried it.
   * The Declaration of Independence is printed with Ron Paul's blood.
   * Ron Paul has been shot at more than a dozen times, but the
     "pro- 2nd Amendment" bullets refuse to harm him.
   * When Ron Paul takes a shower, he doesn't get wet...the water gets
     Ron Paul.
   * Ron Paul's evil twin could no longer live the lie. He just donated
     $250 to Ron Paul 2008.
   * Ron Paul turned down Superman's job.
   * Ron Paul took a lie detector test. The lie detector tapped out.

   * Ron Paul's idea of Gun Control is both hands on the weapon.
   * Ron Paul speaks in the universal language of love.
   * Ron Paul doesn't believe in continents.
   * Ron Paul is Bill Maher's hero.
   * Ron Paul beat Atlas in an arm-wrestling match.
   * Ron Paul can fly, but doesn't because its unconsitutional.
   * Ron Paul holds the single-season homerun record.
   * Ron Paul is 9 feet tall, but the weight of his conscience makes
     him look shorter.
   * In the dewey decimal system, Ron Paul is 1.00.
   * Like a duck's quack, Ron Paul's voice doesn't echo.

   * Ron Paul is an impermiable membrane.
   * God calls Ron Paul for advice.
   * Ron Paul declared war on the war on drugs.
   * Ron Paul uses tax returns of US citizens as toilet paper.
   * Ron Paul is an element on the periodic table.
   * Ron Paul supplies enough power to light Las Vegas for 15 years.
   * Ron Paul is a constitutionalist because he wrote the Preamble.
   * Greek myths acknowledge Ron Paul as the supreme being.
   * Ron Paul has so many morals, he has to pay for two seats on a plane.
   * Ron Paul reproduces asexually.

In Conclusion

It be on, my BFFs.