North Carolina

The twelfth state to enter into the union. It was founded by Sir. Edgar Hoover in 1642. Christopher Columbus is said to have picked flowers with Lady Tori Spelling in the year of the boar.

North Carolina's primary export is communism, as well as free sex and child pornography. Abraham Lincoln was born in the small hamlet of Abraham Lincoln. The common stereotype of the average North Carolinian is that of an inbred moron, but this has been scientifically proven otherwise. North Carolinians are known for their strong sex drive and tire care. They can change a tire in 5 seconds flat!

In July of 2005, the legislature of North Carolina ratified a declaration of independence. All exports of child pornography ceased and the major industrial cogs of the state moved in the direction of digital stimulation. Digital stimulation is the practice by which a computer stimulates the, er, specifics of a human