Changes

== Examples ==

== Examples ==

==='''Homosexual Lifestyle'''===  

==='''Homosexual Lifestyle'''===  

**''A: Activating event:'' Christopher Yuan explains in his book 'Out of A Far Country'<ref name="Yuan's Book">{{cite web |title=christopheryuan |year=2011 |publisher=WaterBrook Press |pages=6,11, 186, 187 |isbn=978-0-307-72935-4  |url=http://books.google.com/books?id=g3KR3nFcl1oC&dq=Christipher+Yuan+Out+of+far+country&hl=sk&sa=X&ei=UNwhUqPuDcqbtQb4qID4Bg&redir_esc=y |isbn=978-0-307-72935-4 |quote=It's not something I can choose. I was born this way...I am gay. ... I went from thinking, ''There is something wrong with me'', to, This is who I am. ... When I stepped into the gay community, I was introduced to a world of outcasts who had come together and become family. ... With my newfound confidence, I became popular in the gay club scene.}}</ref>, co-authored with his mother, that what happened to him, when he was just 9 years old, was that he was exposed to [[pornography]] in a friend's house.<ref name="Yuan's Story">{{cite web |title=Christopher Yuan's story |publisher= |date=3 May 2010 |page=00min:33sec |url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cwmUNqrirO4 |accessdate=August 30, 2013 |quote=When he was 9 years old, Christopher saw pornography in a friend's house. That's when he started thinking: Maybe he was different. Those images just awoke something in me that I didn't know was there but I also noticed that I was attracted by images of both men and women. He decided to keep his feelings secret with hope they will go away, but they didn't. All these feelings were kind of bubbling up in me and I was kind of keeping them held down. ...}}</ref> That gave him a distorted view of what sexuality is and awoke feelings of being attracted by images of both men and women.<ref name="Yuan's web">{{cite web |title=HOPE+ CrossRoads Video |author=Christopher Yuan |publisher=christopheryuan.com |date=3 May 2010 |url=http://www.christopheryuan.com/main/index.html |accessdate=August 30, 2013 |quote= Then at an early age I was exposed to pornography when I was just 9 years old. That really gave me a distorted view of what sexuality is... it was at that point that I realized that there was this attraction that I didn't really understand to both sexes ... I began to experiment with all these things that most kids experiment in college going to the bar and experiment sexually...I came across the gay clubs so I started going to those and I decided this is the way, this is what I was...}}</ref>{{#tag:ref|cf.  

**''A: Activating event:'' [[Christopher Yuan]] explains in his book 'Out of A Far Country'<ref name="Yuan's Book">{{cite web |title=christopheryuan |year=2011 |publisher=WaterBrook Press |pages=6,11, 186, 187 |isbn=978-0-307-72935-4  |url=http://books.google.com/books?id=g3KR3nFcl1oC&dq=Christipher+Yuan+Out+of+far+country&hl=sk&sa=X&ei=UNwhUqPuDcqbtQb4qID4Bg&redir_esc=y |isbn=978-0-307-72935-4 |quote=It's not something I can choose. I was born this way...I am gay. ... I went from thinking, ''There is something wrong with me'', to, This is who I am. ... When I stepped into the gay community, I was introduced to a world of outcasts who had come together and become family. ... With my newfound confidence, I became popular in the gay club scene.}}</ref>, co-authored with his mother, that what happened to him, when he was just 9 years old, was that he was exposed to [[pornography]] in a friend's house.<ref name="Yuan's Story">{{cite web |title=Christopher Yuan's story |publisher= |date=3 May 2010 |page=00min:33sec |url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cwmUNqrirO4 |accessdate=August 30, 2013 |quote=When he was 9 years old, Christopher saw pornography in a friend's house. That's when he started thinking: Maybe he was different. Those images just awoke something in me that I didn't know was there but I also noticed that I was attracted by images of both men and women. He decided to keep his feelings secret with hope they will go away, but they didn't. All these feelings were kind of bubbling up in me and I was kind of keeping them held down. ...}}</ref> That gave him a distorted view of what sexuality is and awoke feelings of being attracted by images of both men and women.<ref name="Yuan's web">{{cite web |title=HOPE+ CrossRoads Video |author=Christopher Yuan |publisher=christopheryuan.com |date=3 May 2010 |url=http://www.christopheryuan.com/main/index.html |accessdate=August 30, 2013 |quote= Then at an early age I was exposed to pornography when I was just 9 years old. That really gave me a distorted view of what sexuality is... it was at that point that I realized that there was this attraction that I didn't really understand to both sexes ... I began to experiment with all these things that most kids experiment in college going to the bar and experiment sexually...I came across the gay clubs so I started going to those and I decided this is the way, this is what I was...}}</ref>{{#tag:ref|cf.  

*Feeling distant from her unsympathetic mother, Anne Frank, a teenage girl, writes of her confusing sexual attraction for females in a diary addressed to imaginary friend: ''"I remember that once when I slept with a girlfriend, I had a strong desire to kiss her and that I did so. I could not help being terribly inquisitive over her body, for she had always kept it hidden from me. ... I go into ecstasies every time I see the naked figure of a woman. ... It strikes me as so wonderful and exquisite that I have difficulty in stopping the tears rolling down my cheeks. If only I had a girlfriend.''" Anne Frank's disclosure is a vivid example of the kinds of thoughts within many young people who occasionally experience this type of attraction. They are both alarmed and excited in the fleeting moments or dreams when their bodies are sexually drawn to the same sex. Same-sex attraction are not unusual among teenagers. Some say that these attractions qualify a person as "homosexual". But this isn't true. The attractions exist, in part, for reasons outside of a person and do not mean they are abnormal. The existence of such feelings, however, signals a deep hunger and profound confusion.<ref name="RBC"/>

*Feeling distant from her unsympathetic mother, Anne Frank, a teenage girl, writes of her confusing sexual attraction for females in a diary addressed to imaginary friend: ''"I remember that once when I slept with a girlfriend, I had a strong desire to kiss her and that I did so. I could not help being terribly inquisitive over her body, for she had always kept it hidden from me. ... I go into ecstasies every time I see the naked figure of a woman. ... It strikes me as so wonderful and exquisite that I have difficulty in stopping the tears rolling down my cheeks. If only I had a girlfriend.''" Anne Frank's disclosure is a vivid example of the kinds of thoughts within many young people who occasionally experience this type of attraction. They are both alarmed and excited in the fleeting moments or dreams when their bodies are sexually drawn to the same sex. Same-sex attraction are not unusual among teenagers. Some say that these attractions qualify a person as "homosexual". But this isn't true. The attractions exist, in part, for reasons outside of a person and do not mean they are abnormal. The existence of such feelings, however, signals a deep hunger and profound confusion.<ref name="RBC"/> Ex-lesbian [[Lisa Miller]] explained that after she quit the homosexual lifestyle she realized that her feelings of [[same-sex attractions]] can just as easily be transferred to a man - ''"it's as if I just want someone to love me,"'' she wrote. The struggles with same-sex attractions are no different than the struggles with loneliness, insecurity, and wanting to fill that emptiness and void with someone who could make a person feel special, loved, and wanted. Especially without a support system such a functional family, these feelings and strong desire to be loved unconditionally could lead to inappropriate thoughts of relationships<ref name="Only1Mommmy"/>, in the ''Extended ABC Theory of Emotion'' called irrational Beliefs.   

* The first Slovak documentary film on the gay community ''Crying of Angels'' (2005-2008) by Zuza Piussi captures the activating event for entering the homosexual lifestyle by one of the film’s major young protagonists  in the following way:

* The first Slovak documentary film on the gay community ''Crying of Angels'' (2005-2008) by Zuza Piussi captures the activating event for entering the homosexual lifestyle by one of the film’s major young protagonists  in the following way:

''"This is the first man in my life to whom I feel so incredibly attached, when I’m falling asleep, I’m thinking of him, my first morning thought belongs to him, when I'm doing whatsoever, I’m thinking of him. Can you imagine how it feels when somebody tells you how he desperately likes you, how he wants you, how he adores every simple bit of your body - I have never experienced anything like that before."'' Yet, after some time, the very same protagonist exhibits signs of replacing his old beliefs with new ones and adopting more accurate self-talk as result of effort to bring his emotional response and behaviour under the control after the lesson learnt how important it is to identify what we are saying to ourselves: ''"We broke up... What if... I became straight. What if I try to attract these chicks, there seem to be passing some right now. Now, after the last break-up, I feel like having an aversion to all guys, I don’t even meet with other males at the moment, nothing, nada, it does not matter whether they are straight or gay... I just feel such inner aversion to all penises...It's brutal how something broke that radically within me, for the first time I started thinking much differently -what if I have my own child, and this kid would not be with a man, what if I have it with wife and live with a woman. Perhaps it would be like passing to some sort of higher level."''<ref name="Piussi">{{cite web  

''"This is the first man in my life to whom I feel so incredibly attached, when I’m falling asleep, I’m thinking of him, my first morning thought belongs to him, when I'm doing whatsoever, I’m thinking of him. Can you imagine how it feels when somebody tells you how he desperately likes you, how he wants you, how he adores every simple bit of your body - I have never experienced anything like that before."'' Yet, after some time, the very same protagonist exhibits signs of replacing his old beliefs and adopting more accurate self-talk as result of effort to bring his emotional response and behaviour under the control after the lesson learnt how important it is to identify what we are saying to ourselves (In the Extended version of ABC theory of Emotion this is called: Detecting/Debating/Discriminating irrational Beliefs (iB) about Activating event, and replacing them and dysfunctional behaviour with Effective rational beliefs/Effective appropriate emotions/Effective functional behaviour)<ref name="Ellis"/>: ''"We broke up... What if... I became straight. What if I try to attract these chicks, there seem to be passing some right now. Now, after the last break-up, I feel like having an aversion to all guys, I don’t even meet with other males at the moment, nothing, nada, it does not matter whether they are straight or gay... I just feel such inner aversion to all penises...It's brutal how something broke that radically within me, for the first time I started thinking much differently -what if I have my own child, and this kid would not be with a man, what if I have it with wife and live with a woman. Perhaps it would be like passing to some sort of higher level."''<ref name="Piussi">{{cite web  

|title=Crying of Angels  

|title=Crying of Angels  

|author= Zuza Piussi  

|author= Zuza Piussi  

**''B: Belief about the activation event and its meaning:'' Little by little, he interpreted the activation event in line with popular unscientific misbelief that such feelings of sexual attraction can only be the result of being 'born gay'.<ref name="Yuan's Book"/>{{#tag:ref|cf.:

**''B: Belief about the activation event and its meaning:'' Little by little, he interpreted the activation event in line with popular unscientific misbelief that such feelings of sexual attraction can only be the result of being 'born gay'.<ref name="Yuan's Book"/>{{#tag:ref|cf.:

*External Link: [http://www.mygenes.co.nz/PDFs/Ch8.pdf Are brains "gay"?]<ref>{{cite web |title=My Genes Made Me Do It! - Homosexuality and the scientific evidence. |author= |url=http://www.mygenes.co.nz/download.htm}}</ref>

*External Link: [http://www.mygenes.co.nz/PDFs/Ch8.pdf Are brains "gay"?]<ref>{{cite web |title=My Genes Made Me Do It! - Homosexuality and the scientific evidence. |author= |url=http://www.mygenes.co.nz/download.htm}}</ref>

*"Worse yet: when people lament their homosexual tendencies, you have just told them, “You’re gay. You were born that way. Accept it.” Of course what you do not realize is that homosexuality is a learned response, a teachable response, and a recruitable response. Such recruitment took place in ancient Greece, and again in medieval Rome. And recent evidence suggests it is taking place again."<ref>{{cite web |title=Homosexuality: Open Letter To Christie |author=Terry Hurlbut |date=August 24, 2013 |url=http://www.conservativenewsandviews.com/2013/08/24/family/homosexuality-open-letter-governor-christie/ |accessdate=October 31, 2013}}</ref>|group=note}}

*"Worse yet: when people lament their homosexual tendencies, you have just told them, “You’re gay. You were born that way. Accept it.” Of course what you do not realize is that homosexuality is a learned response, a teachable response, and a recruitable response. Such recruitment took place in ancient Greece, and again in medieval Rome. And recent evidence suggests it is taking place again."<ref>{{cite web |title=Homosexuality: Open Letter To Christie |author=Terry Hurlbut |date=August 24, 2013 |url=http://www.conservativenewsandviews.com/2013/08/24/family/homosexuality-open-letter-governor-christie/ |accessdate=October 31, 2013}}</ref>

**''C: Behavioural consequences of the belief:'' His belief about the activation event produced his later behavioural patterns including sexual experimentation, visiting gay clubs and bars, and promiscuous sexual encounters with other men.<ref name="Yuan's web"/> This homosexual lifestyle was not caused directly by activation event itself, but by his interpretation of its meaning. Later, after being diagnosed as HIV positive, he realized that his justification for homosexuality was wrong and he mistakenly allowed his feelings and sexual passions to dictate who he was.<ref name="Yuan's Book"/>{{#tag:ref|cf.“This knowledge of who we really are is the gnosis that [[Gnosticism]] is all about.”<ref name="Skarsaune">{{cite book

This teacher was not stupid, she acknowledged my point.<ref>{{cite book |title=Kreuz & Quer in der Szene |author=Novak, Kornelius et al. |publisher=Lichtzeichen-Verlag |year=2010 |pages=110 |isbn=9783869540184 |url=http://lichtzeichen-shop.com/Buecher/Evangelistische-Literatur/Kreuz-Quer-in-der-Szene.html |language=German}}</ref>|group=note}}

**''C: Behavioural consequences of the belief:'' His belief about the activation event produced his later behavioural patterns including sexual experimentation, visiting gay clubs and bars, and promiscuous sexual encounters with other men.<ref name="Yuan's web"/> This homosexual lifestyle was not caused directly by activation event itself, but by his interpretation of its meaning. Later, after being diagnosed as [[HIV]] positive, he realized that his justification for homosexuality was wrong and he mistakenly allowed his feelings and sexual passions to dictate who he was.<ref name="Yuan's Book"/>{{#tag:ref|cf.“This knowledge of who we really are is the gnosis that [[Gnosticism]] is all about.”<ref name="Skarsaune">{{cite book

|author=Oskar Skarsaune

|author=Oskar Skarsaune

|title=In the Shadow of the Temple: Jewish Influence on Early Christianity

|title=In the Shadow of the Temple: Jewish Influence on Early Christianity

|isbn=978-0-8308-2844-9

|isbn=978-0-8308-2844-9

|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=2q6qTb-A7GwC&printsec=frontcover&dq=Oskar+Skarsaune+In+the+shadow+of+the+temple&hl=en&sa=X&ei=6WuMUIihIJTN4QSbnoGIBQ&redir_esc=y

|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=2q6qTb-A7GwC&printsec=frontcover&dq=Oskar+Skarsaune+In+the+shadow+of+the+temple&hl=en&sa=X&ei=6WuMUIihIJTN4QSbnoGIBQ&redir_esc=y

}}</ref>|group=note}} When passions are confused with same-sex attractions, people still have to choose to act on those feelings and their personal beliefs play the key role in this respect.<ref>{{cite book |author=Rena M. Lindevaldsen |title=The Lisa Miller Story: Only One Mommy: A Woman's Battle for Her Life, Her Daughter, and Her Freedom |publisher=New Revolution Publishers |year=2011 |pages=118 |isbn=978-1-937102-01-2 |url=http://www.amazon.com/Only-One-Mommy-Daughter-Freedom/dp/1937102017}}</ref> Slovak homosexual [[Jozef Demjan]] who previously had six relations with men quit his homosexual lifestyle and in 2012 married Julia after he changed the interpretation of his same-sex attractions. He compares them to birds that ''"one cannot prevent from flying all over your head but what one can do is to prevent them to make a nest upon it."''<ref>{{cite web |title=Svadba bez pretvárky, ale plná kontroverznosti! Róm s homosexuálnou minulosťou sa oženil s nerómkou, baptistkou! (Romany young lad with homosexual past has married non-romany babtist girl) |publisher=markiza.sk |date=05. September 2012 |url=http://modrezneba.markiza.sk/clanok/svadba-bez-pretvarky-ale-plna-kontroverznosti.html |accessdate=August 6, 2013|language=Slovak}}</ref><ref>{{cite web |title=Oslobodený z homosexuality - Príbeh Jozefa a Júlie Modré z Neba (Set free from homosexuality: The story of Jozef and Júlia)|url=http://en.gloria.tv/?media=330027 |quote=nezabrániš vtákom aby leteli nad tvojou hlavou ale môžeš zabrániť aby si na nej spravili hniezdo |language=Slovak}}</ref>{{#tag:ref|cf. Homosexuality is a persistent preoccupation with erotic encounters involving members of the same sex, which may or may not be acted out with another person. Put another way, it is making deliberate plans to entertain and cooperate in sexual fantasies or behaviors with someone of the same sex. Although having the same-sex attractions is not something for which we are morally responsible, it is when we begin planning to entertain these attractions in fantasy or behavior that we cross the line. If the attractions turn into a preoccupation, the temptation to embrace homosexual behavior is great.<ref name="RBC">{{cite book |title=When Passions Are Confused|author=Jeff Olson|publisher=RBC Ministries, discoveryseries.org |year=1996 |pages=14 |url=http://jesus-revolution.com/Documents/When_Passions_Are_Confused_Understanding_Homosexuality.pdf}}</ref>|group=note}} Similarly, [[Michael Glatze]], an ex-prominent gay activist and former editor of a San Francisco-based, youth-focused homosexual magazines XY Magazine and Young Gay America (Y.G.A.), renounced homosexuality, decided to break up with his ex-partner of 10 years and in October 2013 married a woman, Rebekah. His transformation from gay to straight began after he started to question his lifestyle following a health scare. Now he stands by his opinion about homosexuality as a flawed and mistaken lifestyle.<ref>{{cite web |title=Former Gay Activist Marries Woman; Addresses Critics Who Condemn His New Heterosexual Lifestyle |author=Jessica Martinez|date=December 13, 2013 |publisher= CP U.S. |url=http://www.christianpost.com/news/former-gay-activist-marries-woman-addresses-critics-who-condemn-his-new-heterosexual-lifestyle-110736/ |accessdate=December 25, 2013 |quote=}}</ref> How we think, what we believe, and the attitudes we've developed largely determine how we will act.<ref name="Simon">{{cite book

}}</ref>|group=note}} When passions are confused with same-sex attractions, people still have to choose to act on those feelings and their personal beliefs play the key role in this respect.<ref name="Only1Mommmy">{{cite book |author=Rena M. Lindevaldsen |title=The Lisa Miller Story: Only One Mommy: A Woman's Battle for Her Life, Her Daughter, and Her Freedom |publisher=New Revolution Publishers |year=2011 |pages=69, 118 |isbn=978-1-937102-01-2 |url=http://www.amazon.com/Only-One-Mommy-Daughter-Freedom/dp/1937102017}}</ref> Slovak homosexual [[Jozef Demjan]] who previously had six relations with men quit his homosexual lifestyle and in 2012 married Julia after he changed the interpretation of his same-sex attractions. He compares them to birds that ''"one cannot prevent from flying all over your head but what one can do is to prevent them to make a nest upon it."''<ref>{{cite web |title=Svadba bez pretvárky, ale plná kontroverznosti! Róm s homosexuálnou minulosťou sa oženil s nerómkou, baptistkou! (Romany young lad with homosexual past has married non-romany babtist girl) |publisher=markiza.sk |date=05. September 2012 |url=http://modrezneba.markiza.sk/clanok/svadba-bez-pretvarky-ale-plna-kontroverznosti.html |accessdate=August 6, 2013|language=Slovak}}</ref><ref>{{cite web |title=Oslobodený z homosexuality - Príbeh Jozefa a Júlie Modré z Neba (Set free from homosexuality: The story of Jozef and Júlia)|url=http://en.gloria.tv/?media=330027 |quote=nezabrániš vtákom aby leteli nad tvojou hlavou ale môžeš zabrániť aby si na nej spravili hniezdo |language=Slovak}}</ref>{{#tag:ref|cf. [[Homosexuality]] is a persistent preoccupation with erotic encounters involving members of the same sex, which may or may not be acted out with another person. Put another way, it is making deliberate plans to entertain and cooperate in sexual fantasies or behaviors with someone of the same sex. Although having the same-sex attractions is not something for which we are morally responsible, it is when we begin planning to entertain these attractions in fantasy or behavior that we cross the line. If the attractions turn into a preoccupation, the temptation to embrace homosexual behavior is great.<ref name="RBC">{{cite book |title=When Passions Are Confused|author=Jeff Olson|publisher=RBC Ministries, discoveryseries.org |year=1996 |pages=14 |url=http://jesus-revolution.com/Documents/When_Passions_Are_Confused_Understanding_Homosexuality.pdf}}</ref>|group=note}} Similarly, [[Michael Glatze]], an ex-prominent gay activist and former editor of a [[San Francisco]]-based, youth-focused homosexual magazines XY Magazine and Young Gay America (Y.G.A.), renounced homosexuality, decided to break up with his ex-partner of 10 years and in October 2013 married a woman, Rebekah. His transformation from gay to straight began after he started to question his lifestyle following a health scare. Now he stands by his opinion about homosexuality as a flawed and mistaken lifestyle.<ref>{{cite web |title=Former Gay Activist Marries Woman; Addresses Critics Who Condemn His New Heterosexual Lifestyle |author=Jessica Martinez|date=December 13, 2013 |publisher= CP U.S. |url=http://www.christianpost.com/news/former-gay-activist-marries-woman-addresses-critics-who-condemn-his-new-heterosexual-lifestyle-110736/ |accessdate=December 25, 2013 |quote=}}</ref> How we think, what we believe, and the attitudes we've developed largely determine how we will act.<ref name="Simon">{{cite book

|title=In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and dealing with Manipulative People

|title=In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and dealing with Manipulative People

|author=George Simon

|author=George Simon