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→Sir Humphrey Appleby: Illustrative quotes
* "A courageous decision, Minister" ''(That'll cost you the election.)''
* "A courageous decision, Minister" ''(That'll cost you the election.)''
* "Have you considered all of the implications?" ''(That's a bad idea.)''
* "Have you considered all of the implications?" ''(That's a bad idea.)''
Sir Humphrey explained the roles of Bernard Wooley and himself to Jim Hacker in the first episode:
:'''Jim:''' Who else is in this department?
:'''Sir Humphrey:''' Well briefly sir I am the Permanent Undersecretary of State known as the Permanent Secretary. Wooley here is your Principle Private Secretary. I too have a Principle Private Secretary, and he is the Principle Private Secretary to the Permanent Secretary. Directly responsible to me are ten Deputy Secretaries, eighty-seven Undersecretaries and two hundred and nineteen assistant secretaries. Directly responsible to the Principle Private Secretaries are Plain Private Secretaries. The Prime Minister will be appointing two Parliamentary Undersecretaries and you will be appointing your own Parliamentary Private Secretary.
:'''Jim:''' Can they all type?
:'''Sir Humphrey:''' None of us can type Minister, Mrs McKay types, she's the secretary
Sir Humphrey was big on verbosity:
:'''Hacker:''' When you give your evidence to the Think Tank, are you going to support my view that the civil service is overmanned and feather-bedded, or not? Yes or no? Straight answer!
:'''Sir Humphrey:''' Well Minister, if you ask me for a straight answer, then I shall say that, as far as we can see, looking at it by and large, taking one thing with another in terms of the average of departments, then in the final analysis it is probably true to say, that at the end of the day, in general terms, you would probably find that, not to put too fine a point on it, there probably wasn't very much in it one way or the other as far as one can see, at this stage.
===Bernard Wooley===
===Bernard Wooley===