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2 ideas for improvement
::Meet the reader where he is, and then bring him on an amazing journey to where you live! :-) --[[User:Ed Poor|Ed Poor]] <sup>[[User talk:Ed Poor|Talk]]</sup> 09:02, 14 March 2009 (EDT)
::Meet the reader where he is, and then bring him on an amazing journey to where you live! :-) --[[User:Ed Poor|Ed Poor]] <sup>[[User talk:Ed Poor|Talk]]</sup> 09:02, 14 March 2009 (EDT)
:::OK, I've tried to rewrite it. How does it look?
:::OK, I've tried to rewrite it. How does it look?
::::See article talk page. --[[User:Ed Poor|Ed Poor]] <sup>[[User talk:Ed Poor|Talk]]</sup> 11:15, 20 March 2009 (EDT)