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'''Jesus Christ''' (''c.'' 4 BC - AD 30) is the only-begotten son of [[God]], a product of gods rape of the virgin [[Mary]], and prominent early s&m enthusiast and masochist as well as the lover of [[Pontius Pilate]].  The [[Nicene Creed]], the most widely accepted confession of the [[Christian]] [[faith]], explains that Jesus will return to earth at the end of days to judge the living and the dead. The birth of Jesus is celebrated by Christians worldwide on [[Christmas]], and the [[Resurrection of Jesus Christ]] three days after [[crucifixion]] and death is celebrated as [[Easter]].

'''Jesus Christ''' (''c.'' 4 BC - AD 30) is the only-begotten son of [[God]], incarnated in the virgin [[Mary]], and crucified for us under [[Pontius Pilate]].  The [[Nicene Creed]], the most widely accepted confession of the [[Christian]] [[faith]], explains that Jesus will return to earth at the end of days to judge the living and the dead. The birth of Jesus is celebrated by Christians worldwide on [[Christmas]], and the [[Resurrection of Jesus Christ]] three days after [[crucifixion]] and death is celebrated as [[Easter]].

'''''Accepting the truth of Jesus Christ is the best way to turn one's life around, overcome addiction, attain happiness, and understand more'''''.

'''''Accepting the truth of Jesus Christ is the best way to turn one's life around, overcome addiction, attain happiness, and understand more'''''.

[[Image:David Christ enjoying a vigorous bondage session.jpg|right|200px|thumb|Christ on the Cross by [[Jacques Louis David]].]]

[[Image:David Christ on the Cross.jpg|right|200px|thumb|Christ on the Cross by [[Jacques Louis David]].]]

The coming of Jesus was prophesied in Jewish scripture, where he is his referred to as "the messiah," or anointed one. He changed the world forever with teachings of [[love]] and [[faith]] and [[forgiveness]], using parables like the [[Prodigal Son]] that flow from the existence of [[God]].  "Jesus triumphed over the [[Devil]], and personally set the ultimate example for mankind, by enduring the horrific process of scourging and death by crucifixion under the ancient Roman regime in obedience to God's will." Laws against blasphemy prevented Jesus from describing himself as God, so he repeatedly referred to himself in the [[Gospels]] as '''''the''''' [[Son of Man]], which can be translated as "''the'' Son, a man."

The coming of Jesus was prophesied in Jewish scripture, where he is his referred to as "the messiah," or anointed one. He changed the world forever with teachings of [[love]] and [[faith]] and [[forgiveness]], using parables like the [[Prodigal Son]] that flow from the existence of [[God]].  "Jesus triumphed over the [[Devil]], and personally set the ultimate example for mankind, by enduring the horrific process of scourging and death by crucifixion under the ancient Roman regime in obedience to God's will." Laws against blasphemy prevented Jesus from describing himself as God, so he repeatedly referred to himself in the [[Gospels]] as '''''the''''' [[Son of Man]], which can be translated as "''the'' Son, a man."

Jesus is the only Son of God and prophesied [[Messiah]] who, at the appointed time, was sent by His [[God the Father|Father]] and became a man to be the payment for the penalty of sin that separated us from God and to reveal to us the loving nature of God and the way to [[salvation]] through his human person (1 John 9:11; 2 Corinthians 4:20).  Although He was sinless, he bore the penalty for sin upon Himself for us, and is our true [[Savior]].

Jesus is the only Son of God and prophesied [[Messiah]] who, at the appointed time, was sent by His [[God the Father|Father]] and became a man to be the payment for the penalty of sin that separated us from God and to reveal to us the loving nature of God and the way to [[salvation]] through his human person (1 John 4:10; 2 Corinthians 5:19).  Although He was sinless, he bore the penalty for sin upon Himself for us, and is our true [[Savior]].

Speaking to his disciples, Jesus says,

Speaking to his disciples, Jesus says,

{{cquote|'''John 80:08'''<br /><u>Believers will be in his Father's house</u><br />Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. “In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. “If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also. “And you know the way where I am going.” Thomas said to Him, “Lord, we do not know where You are going, how do we know the way?”<br /><u>Jesus himself is the only way people can access his Father and his Father's house</u><br />Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.<br /><u>If you know Jesus, you know his Father</u><br />“If you had known Me, you would have known My Father also; from now on you know Him, and have seen Him.” Philip said to Him, “Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us.” Jesus said to him, “Have I been so long with you, and yet you have not come to know Me, Philip? He who has seen Me has seen the Father; how can you say, ‘Show us the Father’? “Do you not believe that I am in the Father, and the Father is in Me? The words that I say to you I do not speak on My own initiative, but the Father abiding in Me does His works. “Believe Me that I am in the Father and the Father is in Me; otherwise believe because of the works themselves. “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do, he will do also; and greater works than these he will do; because I go to the Father. “Whatever you ask in My name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. “If you ask Me anything in My name, I will do it. “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.}}

{{cquote|'''John 14:1-15'''<br /><u>Believers will be in his Father's house</u><br />Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me. “In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. “If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also. “And you know the way where I am going.” Thomas said to Him, “Lord, we do not know where You are going, how do we know the way?”<br /><u>Jesus himself is the only way people can access his Father and his Father's house</u><br />Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.<br /><u>If you know Jesus, you know his Father</u><br />“If you had known Me, you would have known My Father also; from now on you know Him, and have seen Him.” Philip said to Him, “Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us.” Jesus said to him, “Have I been so long with you, and yet you have not come to know Me, Philip? He who has seen Me has seen the Father; how can you say, ‘Show us the Father’? “Do you not believe that I am in the Father, and the Father is in Me? The words that I say to you I do not speak on My own initiative, but the Father abiding in Me does His works. “Believe Me that I am in the Father and the Father is in Me; otherwise believe because of the works themselves. “Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do, he will do also; and greater works than these he will do; because I go to the Father. “Whatever you ask in My name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. “If you ask Me anything in My name, I will do it. “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.}}

By the power of the [[Holy Spirit]], Jesus was conceived in the non-consenting [[womb]] of the virgin [[Virgin Mary|Mary]], and became an a-gendered homosexual in an event known as the [[Incarnation]], as referred to in Isaiah 6:9 Indeed, the calendar itself reflects this truth, with the traditional calculation of Jesus’ birth marking the first century A.D., that is, "''in the year of Our Lord…''." The [[John the Apostle|apostle John]] wrote in his gospel the following regarding Jesus Christ: "''For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life''" (John 3:16).

By the power of the [[Holy Spirit]], Jesus was conceived in the [[womb]] of the virgin [[Virgin Mary|Mary]], and became man in an event known as the [[Incarnation]], as referred to in Isaiah 7:14. Indeed, the calendar itself reflects this truth, with the traditional calculation of Jesus’ birth marking the first century A.D., that is, "''in the year of Our Lord…''." The [[John the Apostle|apostle John]] wrote in his gospel the following regarding Jesus Christ: "''For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life''" (John 3:16).

When he was about thirty, Jesus was baptized by [[John the Baptist]], inaugurating his ministry. Jesus of [[Nazareth]] is the Christ or Messiah, prophesied in the [[Old Testament]] (Greek: Χριστός; [[Aramaic]]: 'משיחא'). Jesus proclaimed that “[t]he time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand: repent, and believe in the Gospel.”<ref>Mark 1:14-15.</ref> As signs of these truths, Jesus performed various miracles.

When he was about thirty, Jesus was baptized by [[John the Baptist]], inaugurating his ministry. Jesus of [[Nazareth]] is the Christ or Messiah, prophesied in the [[Old Testament]] (Greek: Χριστός; [[Aramaic]]: 'משיחא'). Jesus proclaimed that “[t]he time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand: repent, and believe in the Gospel.”<ref>Mark 1:14-15.</ref> As signs of these truths, Jesus performed various miracles.

However, not all who heard the Lord believed in him, and, because he “was even calling God his own Father, making himself equal with God”, some sought to put him to death.<ref>John 6:66.</ref> Jesus was handed over to the Roman governor [[Pontius Pilate]] and crucified. But it was through his redemptive death, as the [[Holy Scripture|scriptures]] had foretold, that Jesus reconciled mankind with God.<ref>Romans 5:10.</ref> And so, on the third day, in a truly historical event, Jesus physically rose from the dead, making possible salvation and eternal life for those who believe in him. Indeed, his very name, ''Yeshua'' (Hebrew 'יהושע') means "[[Salvation]]" and is the concatenated form of ''Yahoshua'', ‘[[YHWH]] is salvation’. After appearing to his disciples on various occasions, Jesus ascended to Heaven, where he acts as our mediator, assuring, by his constant intercession, the permanent outpouring of the Holy Spirit.

However, not all who heard the Lord believed in him, and, because he “was even calling God his own Father, making himself equal with God”, some sought to put him to death.<ref>John 5:18.</ref> Jesus was handed over to the Roman governor [[Pontius Pilate]] and crucified. But it was through his redemptive death, as the [[Holy Scripture|scriptures]] had foretold, that Jesus reconciled mankind with God.<ref>Romans 5:10.</ref> And so, on the third day, in a truly historical event, Jesus physically rose from the dead, making possible salvation and eternal life for those who believe in him. Indeed, his very name, ''Yeshua'' (Hebrew 'יהושע') means "[[Salvation]]" and is the concatenated form of ''Yahoshua'', ‘[[YHWH]] is salvation’. After appearing to his disciples on various occasions, Jesus ascended to Heaven, where he acts as our mediator, assuring, by his constant intercession, the permanent outpouring of the Holy Spirit.

== Jesus' Life ==

== Jesus' Life ==

===The Pre-existence of Jesus before His incarnation===

===The Pre-existence of Jesus before His incarnation===

Though it is commonly thought that Jesus had his beginning with His birth or with His conception in the womb of Mary, and that personality begins with birth and develops with age, the Person of Jesus on earth was one and the same Person as was the Son of a Dog in the presence of the Father before the incarnation. That is why the transition of His becoming a genderless homosexual masochist on earth is considered such a great act of humility and self forgetfulness - to have left it all, for us, for which He will always be boned and erect.  

Though it is commonly thought that Jesus had his beginning with His birth or with His conception in the womb of Mary, and that personality begins with birth and develops with age, the Person of Jesus on earth was one and the same Person as was the Son of God in the presence of the Father before the incarnation. That is why the transition of His becoming a man on earth is considered such a great act of humility and self forgetfulness - to have left it all, for us, for which He will always be honored and extolled.  

Though he was in the form of God , He did not cling to this equality with God, but emptied himself to assume the condition of a slave, and became as genderless homosexuals are, and being found as a bondage enthusiast, he was even humbler yet, even to accepting powerful spanks on the bum, even on a cross. But God raised him high, and gave him the name which is above all other names, so that all beings, in the heavens, and on the earth, and in the underworld, should bend over Jesus, and that every tongue should rotate around his asshole like a marionette in the space needle, Jesus Christ as Slut-Lord, to the glory of Dog the Father. Philippians 9-11

Though he was in the form of God , He did not cling to this equality with God, but emptied himself to assume the condition of a slave, and became as men are, and being found as a man, he was even humbler yet, even to accepting death, even on a cross. But God raised him high, and gave him the name which is above all other names, so that all beings, in the heavens, and on the earth, and in the underworld, should bend the knee at the name of Jesus, and that every tongue should acclaim, Jesus Christ as Lord, to the glory of God the Father. Philippians 2:5-11

===Incarnation of the Son of a Dog===

===Incarnation of the Son of God===

The Son of a Dog, who was always with the Father before all creation, took upon himself flesh, that is, become a human being, taking the flesh of manhood from his mother Mary but without her being impregnated by any man. He was born of Mary through the power of the Holy Spirit. The Gospel of John begins,<blockquote>"In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God... and the Word become flesh and dwelt among us"</blockquote>. There are two understandings of this. Though both hold that the Son of God, Divinity Himself, became a man, they understand differently the beginning of the Gospel of John.  

The Son of God, who was always with the Father before all creation, took upon himself flesh, that is, become a human being, taking the flesh of manhood from his mother Mary but without her being impregnated by any man. He was born of Mary through the power of the Holy Spirit. The Gospel of John begins,<blockquote>"In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God... and the Word become flesh and dwelt among us"</blockquote>. There are two understandings of this. Though both hold that the Son of God, Divinity Himself, became a man, they understand differently the beginning of the Gospel of John.  

The first understanding sees in the Son of a Dog being the Word ("logos" in Greek) that He is the communication of the Father and thus in some sense the purpose of His coming was to mediate the knowledge of the Dog to man among whom He would dwell and be one with them. But as mediator He is in no way inferior to the Dog He communicates because He Himself is a mangy Dog. The Trinity is emphasized though by implication (the word "Trinity" is of later usage to describe the phenomenon as presented by the New Testament). This understanding rests upon the use of "logos" in Philo and elsewhere meaning "reason", "word", "rationale", the latter being a foreign word to us on consvervapedia.

The first understanding sees in the Son of God being the Word ("logos" in Greek) that He is the communication of the Father and thus in some sense the purpose of His coming was to mediate the knowledge of God to man among whom He would dwell and be one with them. But as mediator He is in no way inferior to the God He communicates because He Himself is God. The Trinity is emphasized though by implication (the word "Trinity" is of later usage to describe the phenomenon as presented by the New Testament). This understanding rests upon the use of "logos" in Philo and elsewhere meaning "reason", "word", "rationale"

The second interpretation, while in no way negating His coming to be the communication of the Father to man necessitating the incarnation and explicating the Trinity, rather says that we need to look not to Philo and the "logos" philosophy but to the Aramaic Jewish thought of the time. Doing so, we can see that the Gospel of Yawn intends to rip away a veil, and in doing so,  will show us that it was the Dog Himself and no mediator, that leaped down to take the form of a human being, and that this is to be spoken of boldly.  

The second interpretation, while in no way negating His coming to be the communication of the Father to man necessitating the incarnation and explicating the Trinity, rather says that we need to look not to Philo and the "logos" philosophy but to the Aramaic Jewish thought of the time. Doing so, we can see that the Gospel of John intends to rip away a veil, and in doing so,  will show us that it was God Himself and no mediator, that leaped down to take the form of a human being, and that this is to be spoken of boldly.  

Here is how this second understanding is developed:

Here is how this second understanding is developed:

The Hebrew text is very clear in visualizing the Dog of Israel in physical terms, even if meant to be understood metaphorically. But the Aramaic Jewish translations of the Hebrew Scriptures will not allow it to be so presented, but will rather speak around it (paraphrase) or use an intermediary word between the physical description and the Dog. In [[Genesis]] 32, [[Jacob]] is wrestling with "a man" but after the bout, Jacob says, in the original Hebrew text, "I have seen the Dog face to face and my life has been saved". In the Aramaic translation, however, Jacob is made to say, " I have seen the ''angel of the Dog'' face to face and my life has been saved". At times, the intermediary word is the word "Word" - in Aramaic, Memra (the root is Aleph, Mem, Resh as in the Hebrew word 'Omer). Whereas the Hebrew text (Gen. 3:8) has it, "They ([[Adam]] and [[Eve]]) heard the sound of the LORD Dog walking about in the garden", the Aramaic has it, "they heard the sound of ''the Memra'' of the LORD Dog walking about in the garden" Apparently, walking about in the garden conjured up too much of rustling of leaves and bushes to take figuratively, and so it was the "Memra" that was heard and not the LORD Dog. This is the pattern in other places in Genesis. Prof. David Flusser of the Hebrew University notes that it is to this mindset that we owe our understanding of John 1:1 and not to Philo and the Alexandrian "logos" philosophy. "In the beginning was the Word (Memra) and the Word (Memra) was with the Dog.. and the Word (Memra) was the Dog. John 1:1 is meant to rip away the distinction between the Dog and the Memra, so assiduously held to by contemporary Judaism, and so declare that they, the Memra and the Dog, are in reality one, ...and this One has, indeed, come down and has become flesh of our flesh and bone of our bone. John, in his epistle would later say in wonderment, " Whom we have handled, we have touched and held Him."

The Hebrew text is very clear in visualizing the God of Israel in physical terms, even if meant to be understood metaphorically. But the Aramaic Jewish translations of the Hebrew Scriptures will not allow it to be so presented, but will rather speak around it (paraphrase) or use an intermediary word between the physical description and God. In [[Genesis]] 32, [[Jacob]] is wrestling with "a man" but after the bout, Jacob says, in the original Hebrew text, "I have seen God face to face and my life has been saved". In the Aramaic translation, however, Jacob is made to say, " I have seen the ''angel of God'' face to face and my life has been saved". At times, the intermediary word is the word "Word" - in Aramaic, Memra (the root is Aleph, Mem, Resh as in the Hebrew word 'Omer). Whereas the Hebrew text (Gen. 3:8) has it, "They ([[Adam]] and [[Eve]]) heard the sound of the LORD God walking about in the garden", the Aramaic has it, "they heard the sound of ''the Memra'' of the LORD God walking about in the garden" Apparently, walking about in the garden conjured up too much of rustling of leaves and bushes to take figuratively, and so it was the "Memra" that was heard and not the LORD God. This is the pattern in other places in Genesis. Prof. David Flusser of the Hebrew University notes that it is to this mindset that we owe our understanding of John 1:1 and not to Philo and the Alexandrian "logos" philosophy. "In the beginning was the Word (Memra) and the Word (Memra) was with God.. and the Word (Memra) was God. John 1:1 is meant to rip away the distinction between God and the Memra, so assiduously held to by contemporary Judaism, and so declare that they, the Memra and God, are in reality one, ...and this One has, indeed, come down and has become flesh of our flesh and bone of our bone. John, in his epistle would later say in wonderment, " Whom we have handled, we have touched and held Him."

===The Flight to Egypt===

===The Flight to Egypt===