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1,664 bytes added ,  09:54, November 28, 2007
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Se see no reason what is so wrong about the second version that it requires reversion. [[User:Order|Order]] 20:23, 27 November 2007 (EST)
 
Se see no reason what is so wrong about the second version that it requires reversion. [[User:Order|Order]] 20:23, 27 November 2007 (EST)
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:* 'Although the terms of the treaty were never fully enforced' Along with your other wording this can imply that the conditions were relatively minor.  If you are going to say they were never fully enforced, then you need to describe just what was enforced, such as the French occupying the German factories and the shooting of German workers who walked off the job in protest.
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:* 'The republic was also struggling with the rejection by monarchists'  Firstly, you haven't yet discussed the Republic so you're bringing it up before introducing it.  Secondly, this appears to be rather unimportant as the monarchists didn't stage a coup or any other direct confrontation.  All governments have their opponents, especially after government changes.
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:* 'economic resurgence'  That reminds me of when Priceline went from $80 to $1.25, and then back to $1.50.  I suppose the move from $1.25 to $1.50 could be described as an economic resurgence.  And again, you describe the resurgence before you describe the crisis, so it is the wrong order.
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:* 'great depression... Adolf Hitler to rise up on the scene...'  Hitler was active well before the great depression and the conditions that allowed him to be active existed before the Great Depression.  This skirts the first 10 years of hardship in Germany from the end of WWI until the Depression itself.
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:* Even if your section was perfect, the idea that you see nothing wrong with the section that requires reversion misses the point of the proper way to discuss and implement changes.  But that is already discussed above so I will leave it at that. [[User:Learn together|Learn together]] 04:54, 28 November 2007 (EST)
    
Perhaps one (or both?) of you need(s) to reread [[Help:Editing Etiquette|Editing Etiquette]].  [[User:Philip J. Rayment|Philip J. Rayment]] 20:37, 27 November 2007 (EST)
 
Perhaps one (or both?) of you need(s) to reread [[Help:Editing Etiquette|Editing Etiquette]].  [[User:Philip J. Rayment|Philip J. Rayment]] 20:37, 27 November 2007 (EST)
nsTeam1RO, nsTeam1RW, nsTeam1_talkRO, nsTeam1_talkRW
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