Conservapedia:Scripture humor
While Conservapedia is an encyclopedia which covers a wide variety of topics in a serious manner, humor is a natural part of life's enjoyments, and when it comes to different topics, the Bible is no exception. Feel free to add well–thought out, clever jokes below, adding to the top of the list so newest ones appear first. Please sign your username with ~~~~ as you would for a talk page.
One day, a man walks by a fortune-teller, who asks, "Would you like to know the future?" The man responds, "Sure, just buy me a one-way ticket to the Island of Patmos!"
—LT (Mark 8:36) Wednesday, 23:37, January 3, 2023 (EST)
One day, John and James, the sons of Zebedee, came running to Jesus, bursting with excitement. They told Him, "Teacher, let's play a round of amongus!" Jesus declined, responding, "I'll already know who the imposter is." —LT (Mark 8:36) Sunday, 23:41, December 31, 2022 (EST)
Let's suppose that the four writers of the Gospels are suddenly brought back to life, in the 21st century. One of them gazes around at the world beholding him, rereads the fifth book he wrote, and suddenly has a moment of sorrow, pity, and internal anguish, knowing what will soon unfold. However, he ultimately looks up at the sky and smiles, knowing the ultimate ending.
The other three are in a courtroom, arguing over copyright infringement.
—LT (Exodus 23:2) Wednesday, 20:05, December 27, 2022 (EST)
Two Christians are debating. One says: "I think you're being absent-minded." The other one responds: "Well, for me, to be absent from the mind is to think with the Lord."
—LT (Exodus 23:2) Wednesday, 19:59, December 27, 2022 (EST)
Suppose that Peter is brought back to life one day, in a summer season, sometime in the 21st century. He visits a local church one weekend, arriving quite early in the morning, and is quite hungry by lunchtime. The normal churchgoers ask him, "How would you like to try today's delightful special of bacon-wrapped lobster rolls with a side of oysters and shrimp salad?" —LT (Exodus 23:2) Wednesday, 19:56, December 27, 2022 (EST)
Q. What was Jesus' last words to Judas?
A. Whatever thou must do, do so quickly. So he got a rope and hung himself.
—The preceding unsigned comment was added by RobSmith (talk)
