Difference between revisions of "Satan"
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== History and Goals == | == History and Goals == | ||
| − | + | Beelzeboss (The Final Showdown)" | |
| − | + | Beelzeboss | |
| − | + | [Beelz] I am complete! | |
| − | [[ | + | = [ |
| − | + | This world will be mine and you're first in line you brought me the pick and now you shall both die! | |
| − | + | [JB] Wait! Wait! Wait! you we challenge you to a rock off! give us one chance to rock your socks off | |
| − | + | [Beelz] the demon code prevents me from declining a rock off challenge what are your terms? what is the catch? | |
| − | + | [JB] If we win, you must take your sorry ass back to hell. and also you will have to pay our rent | |
| − | + | [Beelz] And what if *i* win? [JB] then you can take Kage back to hell... [KG] What? [JB] trust me Kage, its the only way, [KG] What the hell are you talking about? [JB] to be your little SLAVE [Beelz] Fine! Let the rock off begin!ha ha I'm the devil i love metal! Check this riff it's pretty tasty I'm the devil i can do what i want, whatever i got I'm gonna flaunt, there's never been a rock off that I've ever lost i cant wait to take Kage back to hell I'm gonna fill him with my hot demon gel I'll make him squeal like my scarlet pimpernel | |
| − | + | [JB] No! c'mon Kage bring the thunder [KG] there's just no way that we can win, that was a masterpiece. [JB] listen to me [KG] he rocks too hard because he's not a mortal man he gonna make you his sex slave, you're gonna gargle mayonnaise [KG] no unless we bust a massive monster mama-jam. [KG] dude, we've been through so much [BOTH] now its time to blow this guy down! [JB] C'mon Kage now it's time to blow doors down [KG] I hear you Jables now it's time to blow doors down [JB] Light up the stage cause its time for a showdown [KG] We'll bend you over then we'll take you to Brown Town [BOTH] Now we've got to blow this guy down [KG] He's gonna rape me if we do not blow doors down [JB] C'mon Kage cause it's time to blow doors down [KG] Oh we'll piledrive ya, it's time for the smackdown [JB] Hey anti-christ-er, Beelzeboss, we know your weakness our rocket-sauce we rock the casbah, and blow your mind we will defeat you, for all mankind you hold the scepter, we hold the key you are the devil, we are the D [18x] | |
| − | + | [Beelz] You guys are really lame. Come on Kage, You're coming with me. Taste my lightning losers! | |
| − | + | [Tenacious D:] [JB] NO! | |
| − | + | [Beelz] oh no! | |
| − | + | [JB] From whence you came you shall remain, until you are complete again | |
| − | + | [Beelz] No! screw you Kage and screw you Jables! I'll get you Tenacious D! | |
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== Jewish Views == | == Jewish Views == | ||
Revision as of 21:29, September 19, 2009
Satan (from the Hebrew "ha-satan", meaning the "accuser", "tempter", "persecutor", "calumniator" or "adversary") was a member of the divine council of God referenced in the Old Testament in Job. He is referenced 11 times in Job and 4 other times in the Old Testament. The New Testament mentions Satan 34 times in all starting with the first book Matthew and ending with the last Revelation. In the Christian tradition he rebelled against God and is now the enemy of God and man alike. He is the father of lies and no good is found in him. He leads a host of fallen angels (or demons) who know their days are numbered before they will be cast in the lake of fire and they seek to take as many humans as possible with them. Those who worship Satan are called Satanists.
The three classic defenses against Satan are:
- mockery, which Satan cannot withstand due to his pride
- sunlight or exposure, from which Satan hides
- the Holy Spirit, meaning "The Advocate" (i.e., defense lawyer), or the Armor of God[1].
Note that Satan lacks self-restraint, which often leads him to failure. In addition, Satan delights in deceit, even to the point of causing his downfall.
History and Goals
Beelzeboss (The Final Showdown)" Beelzeboss [Beelz] I am complete! = [ This world will be mine and you're first in line you brought me the pick and now you shall both die! [JB] Wait! Wait! Wait! you we challenge you to a rock off! give us one chance to rock your socks off [Beelz] the demon code prevents me from declining a rock off challenge what are your terms? what is the catch? [JB] If we win, you must take your sorry ass back to hell. and also you will have to pay our rent [Beelz] And what if *i* win? [JB] then you can take Kage back to hell... [KG] What? [JB] trust me Kage, its the only way, [KG] What the hell are you talking about? [JB] to be your little SLAVE [Beelz] Fine! Let the rock off begin!ha ha I'm the devil i love metal! Check this riff it's pretty tasty I'm the devil i can do what i want, whatever i got I'm gonna flaunt, there's never been a rock off that I've ever lost i cant wait to take Kage back to hell I'm gonna fill him with my hot demon gel I'll make him squeal like my scarlet pimpernel [JB] No! c'mon Kage bring the thunder [KG] there's just no way that we can win, that was a masterpiece. [JB] listen to me [KG] he rocks too hard because he's not a mortal man he gonna make you his sex slave, you're gonna gargle mayonnaise [KG] no unless we bust a massive monster mama-jam. [KG] dude, we've been through so much [BOTH] now its time to blow this guy down! [JB] C'mon Kage now it's time to blow doors down [KG] I hear you Jables now it's time to blow doors down [JB] Light up the stage cause its time for a showdown [KG] We'll bend you over then we'll take you to Brown Town [BOTH] Now we've got to blow this guy down [KG] He's gonna rape me if we do not blow doors down [JB] C'mon Kage cause it's time to blow doors down [KG] Oh we'll piledrive ya, it's time for the smackdown [JB] Hey anti-christ-er, Beelzeboss, we know your weakness our rocket-sauce we rock the casbah, and blow your mind we will defeat you, for all mankind you hold the scepter, we hold the key you are the devil, we are the D [18x] [Beelz] You guys are really lame. Come on Kage, You're coming with me. Taste my lightning losers! [Tenacious D:] [JB] NO! [Beelz] oh no! [JB] From whence you came you shall remain, until you are complete again [Beelz] No! screw you Kage and screw you Jables! I'll get you Tenacious D!
Jewish Views
In the Jewish tradition, Satan is an angel who faithfully serves God as a prosecuting attorney - one who accuses men of wickedness and impiety. At the direction of God, Satan may be permitted to test these accusations, such as in Job. In this view, Satan's goal is not to lead men away from their faithfulness to God, but merely to reveal the true depths of their devotion, although in I Chronicles 21:1 Satan provoked David to take a census of the people of Israel against the will of God and 70,000 men are slain because of it.
Notes
- ↑ Ephesians 6:1-17
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