Self-control

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Self-control is the ability to resist and/or actively avoid one's temptations and impulses.[1][2]

Self-Control is defined by the Meriam Dictionary as "restraint exercised over one's own impulses, emotions, or desires".[3] Self-control can also avoid actively avoiding temptations (For example, if one has a problem with eating a healthy diet, one does not walk into a fast-food restaurant).[4] See also: Will (psychology) and Free will

Self-control and the Holy Spirit/Bible

See also: Self-control (Bible)

Praying Hands.

The Christian apologist Gary Habermas wrote: "Double-blind prayer experiments: where people pray for others with terminal illness. Habermas admitted that most such experiments have not worked, but the three that he knows of that have indeed worked were cases of orthodox-Christians praying for the sick."[5]

One of the fruits of the Holy Spirit.

The Fruits of the Holy Spirit are perfections that the Holy Spirit forms in us as the first fruits of eternal glory. The tradition of the Church lists twelve of them.

Self-control and the Bible/Christianity

Articles:

Video:

Book:

Bible verses on self-control

Video/audio:

Bible verses on resisting temptation

Religion and self-control

Engaging in virtuous behavior and quenching temptations to engage in immoral behavior requires self-control.

According to the abstract of the 2021 journal article Does religion make people more self-controlled? A review of research from the lab and life published in the journal Current Opinion in Psychology: "We do find evidence, however, that rituals (most notably, prayer), along with exposure to religious environments and institutions in the real world (e.g. religious schooling) influence self-control on the scale of weeks, months, and years — a conclusion that is also supported by rigorous longitudinal research."[6]

In the journal article Religion, self-regulation, and self-control: Associations, explanations, and implications, psychologists McCullough and Willoughby theorize that many of the positive links of religiousness with health and social behavior may be caused by religion's beneficial influences on self-control/self-regulation.[7][8] Furthermore, a 2012 Queen's University study published in Psychological Science found that religion replenishes self-control.[9][10]

Research of Andrew Newberg M.D. related to intense prayer

Research indicates that 12 minutes of daily intense prayer over an eight-week period can change the brain to such a degree that it can be measured on a brain scan. This method of prayer appears to increase activity in brain areas associated with social interaction and compassion/thoughtfulness. In addition, it increases frontal lobe activity as focus and intentionality increase.[11][12][13]

Increasing self-control techniques

Homer

Below are various techniques to increase self-control:[14]

1. Set clear goals. See: Goal setting

2. Eat three meals a day and eat low glycemic index foods (People with low glucose levels have lower levels of willpower).

3. Get enough sleep. Tired people have lower levels of willpower.

4. Bright lines method (Making steadfast rules that you absolutely commit to. For example, a person committing to eating healthier making a steadfast rule not to go into convenience stores).

5. Behavior monitoring (Get on scale every day for weight loss, use a spreadsheet to track daily performance, etc.)

6. Precommitment strategy which involves restricting choices to better alternatives (Only buying healthy food at grocery store or using portion control for weight loss; browser addons that block various time wasting websites for better time management, etc.). In Homer's book The Odyssey, Ulysses tells his sailors to bind him to the mast of his ship and block their ears before sailing past the island of the Sirens, whose enchanting song draws sailors to shipwreck.

7. Turn a positive behavior into a habit (For example, exercising at the same time every day.).

8. Regular exercise increases willpower.[15]

9. Practice self-regulation strategies/techniques such as positive self-talk and delaying gratification. Self-control involves inhibiting impulses and emotions whereas self-regulation focuses on reducing the intensity and frequency of those impulses. Being mindful of your thoughts and emotions helps you identify triggers and make conscious choices to manage your behavior. [16]

10. Removing temptations from your environment makes it easier to resist impulsive behaviors.

Additional key points in increasing self-control

"To increase self-control, you can: remove temptations from your environment, practice mindfulness through meditation, set clear goals, delay gratification, exercise regularly, monitor your behavior, manage stress, get enough sleep, and cultivate self-awareness; essentially, by actively identifying triggers and making conscious choices to resist impulsive actions and stay focused on your long-term objectives."[17]

Articles on self-control techniques:

Kelly McGonigal self-control methods and other research

Kelly McGonigal

Kelly McGonigal defines willpower as "the ability to do what you really want to do when part of you really doesn’t want to do it."

It consists of three elements:

  1. I will – the ability to do what you need to do
  2. I won't – resisting temptation
  3. I want – Your goals and noble desires

McGonigal recommends increasing willpower though getting proper sleep, exercise and nutrition. Engaging in mindfulness and meditation. Meditation can increase the prefrontal cortex part of the brain which is a center of the brain key to willpower.[18][19]

Future self

Self-control via habits

James Clear on habits

James Clear is a best-selling author who wrote the book Atomic Habits.

Self- control via habits: Mental Contrasting with Implementation Intentions (MCII)

Videos: Mental Contrasting with Implementation Intentions (MCII)

Self-control via daily routines

The creative lives of massively productive people like John Milton, Charles Dickens, Ludwig Beethoven and Edison follow strict daily routines. (i.e., when they would get up, when they would start work, when they would exercise and when they would relax). Peak productivity’s not about luck. It’s about devotion.

Sunday Adelja: What the will is

Dr. Sunday Adelaja

See also: Will

Sunday Adelaja in his book A Man or a Mouse writes:

“ In psychology, it is said that "a human, as a personality, can assert himself only by free will. By his will, he overcomes both the finiteness of his life and social partitions. The attributes of a man are will, mind and emotions."
  • Mind - one of the forms of consciousness, a self-conscious mind directed at itself and the conceptual content of its knowledge. The mind expresses itself in principles, ideas, and ideals.
  • Emotions - from immediate feelings to the real object to feelings related to social values and ideals Will - a conscious regulation by the subject of his activity and behavior, ensuring the overcoming of difficulties in achieving his goal.
  • Will - a conscious regulation by the subject of his activity and behavior, ensuring the overcoming of difficulties in achieving his goal...

The meaning of the word "will" according to Ephraim:

  • "One of the basic abilities of a person, consisting in the conscious regulation of one's behavior, the management of one's actions.
  • Conscious desire to fulfill or achieve the goal; tenacity, perseverance

"Will" in the Encyclopedic Dictionary:

  • Will - ability to choose activities and internal efforts necessary for its implementation.
  • A specific act that allows a person to resist the power of spontaneous wants and impulsive desires: for him, it is not the case of "I want" that is of priority, but rather "this is necessary," "It’s a must," creates the awareness of the characteristic value of the goal of his action.
  • Will includes decision making, often accompanied by a struggle of motives and its implementation.[20]
 ”
Book cover of Sunday Adelja's book A Man or a Mouse

Sunday Adelja in his book A Man or a Mouse also indicates:

“ Traditional psychology considers will, as a source of inner activity of a person, independent of external factors. The will is also explained as a person's inner capacity to commit an act, or to a free personal choice. A person commits only the action he decided to accomplish by refraining from others. The main sign of a volitional action is consistency with a certain intellectual plan: the action is not accidental or situational. The will is characterized by meaningfulness - actions are carried out at an appreciable level. In the process of making a strong-willed decision, a person faces the struggle of different internal motives, and if he is not able to suppress immediate situational wants, it then means that he is under the power of his immediate desires. In the performance of willful actions, a person clearly imagines possible positive consequences, which serves as an additional stimulus and helps to combat situational motivations. Thus, the will, as a human quality, is the ability to make a choice and to take the necessary actions to achieve your goal.

The world does not stand still, and we are developing along with it even as new ideas for the realization of our businesses and potentials are emerging. And, in order to end successfully, not to abandon our progress when faced with difficulties, we need the willpower. This includes several stages that are so necessary for achieving any life goal such as:

1. Awareness and the desire to achieve it

2. Awareness of a number of opportunities to achieve the goal

3. The appearance of motives that approve or deny these opportunities

4. Fighting motives and choices Acceptance of one of the possibilities as a solution

5. Acceptance of one of the possibilities as a solution

6. Implementation of the decision.

7. Overcoming external obstacles to the implementation of the decision and the very achievement of it

Will - as a generator of our inner strength and capabilities and as one of the most complex mental processes - creates in a person certain states: proactivity, concentration, readiness for action, etc.[21]

”

Science of self-control/willpower

The human brain is the most complex physical entity in the universe.[22][23][24]

Discipline vs. self-control

See also: Discipline

"Discipline generally refers to the proactive act of taking action to achieve a goal, often by following a set routine or plan, while "self-control" focuses on actively resisting temptations or impulses to avoid doing something you shouldn't, essentially saying "no" to immediate desires in favor of a long-term objective; in simpler terms, discipline is about "doing what you need to do" even when you don't feel like it, while self-control is about "not doing something you want to do" to stay on track with your goals."[25]

Disciplined thinking

Videos:

Self-motivation

See also: Self-motivation

Self-motivation is the internal drive that leads one to take action towards a goal.[26][27] It keeps us moving forward, even when we don't want to.

Types of motivation

"Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win." - The Apostle Paul, 1 Corinthians 9:24

The website Skillsyouneed.com indicates:

"In thinking about self-motivation, it is helpful to understand what motivates you to do things.
There are two main types of motivators: ‘intrinsic’ and ‘extrinsic’.
In their simplest form you can think about these two types of motivation as:
Intrinsic = related to what we want to do.
Extrinsic = related to what we have to do.
A more detailed definition is:
Intrinsic: To perform an action or task based on the expected or perceived satisfaction of performing the action or task. Intrinsic motivators include having fun, being interested and personal challenge.
Extrinsic: To perform an action or task in order to attain some sort of external reward, including money, power and good marks or grades.
Different people are motivated by different things and at different times in their lives. The same task may have more intrinsic motivators at certain times and more extrinsic motivators at others, and most tasks have a combination of the two types of motivation.[28]

Self-motivation articles

Researchers and psychologists who view self-control and willpower as being different

Odysseus vs. the Sirens in Homer's Odyssey

The Science News article Most people say self-control is the same as willpower. Researchers disagree indicates:

“ Psychologists say self-control is about planning ahead to avoid needing willpower in the moment.

A scientific squabble over how to define self-control draws from an unlikely source: A story from Greek mythology.

Sailing home to Ithaca after the Trojan War, Odysseus longed to hear the Sirens’ legendary song. But he knew that was a very bad idea. The Sirens, the goddess Circe had warned, lured passing sailors to their island to kill them. So Circe helped Odysseus form a plan. As his boat approached the Sirens’ island, Odysseus handed crew members balls of wax to plug their ears, and he ordered the men to tie him firmly to the boat’s mast. He told the crew to tie him tighter if he begged and pleaded to heed the Sirens’ call. His plan in place, Odysseus was able to both hear the Sirens and live to tell the tale.

The science is clear. Proverbially tying oneself to the mast — or crafting strategies in advance to thwart temptation — is the optimal way to meet one’s goals. But not all agree that such preemptive strategies constitute self-control.

Social psychologists say Odysseus utilized exemplary self-control. That’s because they tend to distinguish between strategic self-control — that is, the Odysseus approach — and willpower. Willpower would be akin to Odysseus resisting the Sirens’ call in the moment without rope and muscular crewmen...

But then research began to emerge that challenged that framework. In one study, researchers analyzed the results of about 100 self-control studies of almost 33,000 participants. People who scored high in self-control were no better than others at resisting temptation in the moment, those scientists reported in the February 2012 Personality and Social Psychology Review. Instead, such individuals reported having established habits or routines.

In another study, researchers pinged over 200 people on beepers several times a day to measure their desires in real time. Individuals who scored high in self-control reported experiencing less temptation and weaker desires than those with lower scores, the team reported in the June 2012 Journal of Personality and Social Psychology...

Those studies led to a seismic shift in the field of self-control, says social psychologist Malte Friese of Saarlund University in Saarbrücken, Germany, who was not involved in that work. “Apparently the people who are good in self-control … don’t inhibit all day long. They do something different.”

Thus began the willpower/self-control split. Scientists began exploring the tools that could help people do those different things — while sticking to the moniker “self-control.” Some research focused on strategies people could call on in the moment to move beyond simple willpower to resist temptation, says Kentaro Fujita, a social psychologist at the Ohio State University in Columbus. For instance, research has shown that distracting oneself or focusing on the negative aspects of a temptation can help people overcome immediate desires.

But with evidence mounting that preplanning à la Odysseus presented the key to long-term success, that’s where researchers focused their attention, says Fujita, who outlined those strategies in the October 2020 Policy Insights from the Behavioral and Brain Sciences. Some tips include linking goal failure to a self-imposed punishment, such as forcing oneself to donate to a loathed organization. Another involves bundling a disliked action — say, running — with a desirable one, such as listening to a favorite podcast.

“This article challenges a common belief: that successful self-control requires willpower,” Fujita and his coauthors wrote.[29]

”

According to Jeremy Sutton Ph.D.:

“ We could define willpower and see its benefits as (American Psychological Association, 2012):
  • Resisting short-term temptations and delay gratification to achieve long-term goals
  • Overriding unwanted thoughts, feelings, or impulses
  • Responding coolly and calmly rather than behave too emotionally
  • Conscious, effortful regulation of oneself by oneself
  • A limited resource that can be depleted[30]
 ”

Quotes on self-control

Calvin Coolidge in 1919

See also: Self-control, willpower and resisting temptation quotes

  • "By constant self-discipline and self-control you can develop greatness of character." - Grenville Kleiser
  • "I value self-discipline, but creating systems that make it next to impossible to misbehave is more reliable than self-control." - Tim Ferriss
  • "Self-control, openness, the ability to engage with others, to plan and to persist - these are the attributes that get people in the door and on the job, and lead to productive lives." - James Heckman
  • "Every successful person has a fair amount of self-control - it's just the nature of success." - Laird Hamilton
  • "Self-management and self-control are the keys to advanced knowledge, and both are difficult to learn without a sense of your own cultural identity." - KRS-One
  • "Self-control is one mark of a mature person; it applies to control of language, physical treatment of others, and the appetites of the body." - Joseph B. Wirthlin
  • "Emotional self-control is the result of hard work, not an inherent skill." - Travis Bradberry
  • “For whatever goal you want to achieve, there is discomfort along that path. Self-discipline drives you through this discomfort and allows you to achieve and attain. It’s an essential component of mastery, and nothing great was ever accomplished without it.” - Peter Hollins
  • "Self-discipline is the ability to make yourself do what you should do when you should do it, whether you feel like it or not." -Elbert Hubbard.
  • “Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment.” – Jim Rohn
  • “The fact is, self-discipline is only punishment when imposed by someone else. When you discipline yourself, it’s not punishment but empowerment.” - Les Brown
  • "Industry, thrift and self-control are not sought because they create wealth, but because they create character.' - Calvin Coolidge
  • "Since self-control is vital to reaching long-term goals, befriending people with willpower could be the secret to success. Whether you're tempted to skip that workout at the gym, or you're considering blowing this month's budget, spending time with a disciplined friend could boost your motivation to maintain healthy habits." - Amy Morin
  • "You will never have a greater or lesser dominion than that over yourself…the height of a man’s success is gauged by his self-mastery; the depth of his failure by his self-abandonment…and this is the law of eternal justice. He who cannot establish dominion over himself will have no dominion over others." – Leonardo da Vinci
  • “Discipline is choosing between what you want now, and what you want most.” - Abraham Lincoln
  • “Why is discipline important? Discipline teaches us to operate by principle rather than desire. Saying no to our impulses (even the ones that are not inherently sinful) puts us in control of our appetites rather than vice versa. It deposes our lust and permits truth, virtue, and integrity to rule our minds instead.” - John MacArthur Jr.

Quotes on willpower

Erasmus by Hans Holbein the Younger

See also: Self-control, willpower and resisting temptation quotes

  • "Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will." - Mahatma Gandhi
  • "Research shows that willpower is more important than IQ. That’s why the point isn’t to become smarter, but to become more self-disciplined." - Adam Kirk Smith
  • “There is no such thing as a great talent without great willpower.” Honore de Balzac
  • “Ahead of us are not reasons and arguments, But will and desire.” - Paulo Coelho
  • "Willpower is essential to the accomplishment of anything worthwhile." - Brian Tracy
  • "The will to win is not nearly as important as the will to prepare to win." - Coach Bobby Knight
  • “The biggest enemies of willpower: temptation, self-criticism, and stress. (...) these three skills — self-awareness, self-care, and remembering what matter most — are the foundation for self-control.” - Kelly McGonigal, The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It
  • “There is a secret for greater self-control, the science points to one thing: the power of paying attention.” - Kelly McGonigal, The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It
  • Never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never-in nothing, great or small, large or petty – never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy. - Winston Churchill
  • "With but few exceptions, it is always the underdog who wins through sheer willpower." - Johnny Weissmuller
  • I am, indeed, a king, because I know how to rule myself." – Pietro Aretino
  • "Will is character in action." - William McDougall
  • "I don’t wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must know it has got to get down to work." - Pearl S. Buck
  • "Willpower is trying very hard not to do something you want to do very much." – John Ortberg on temptation
  • "The will is the keystone in the arch of human achievement. It is the culmination of our complex mental faculties. It is the power that rules minds, men and nations." - Thomas Parker Boyd
  • "What you have to do and the way you have to do it is incredibly simple. Whether you are willing to do it, that’s another matter." - Business consultant Peter F. Drucker
  • "Willpower gets you started. Habits get you results." - Priit Kalas

Journal article

Books

  • No Excuses!: The Power of Self-Discipline by Brian Tracy. Vanguard Press (March 22, 2011)

See also

External links

Increasing self-control, general articles/videos:

Videos:

Notes

  1. ↑ Self-Control - Webster-Merriam dictionary
  2. ↑ Trait self-control and the avoidance of temptation, Personality and Individual Differences. Volume 74, February 2015, Pages 12-15
  3. ↑ Self-Control - Webster-Merriam dictionary
  4. ↑ Trait self-control and the avoidance of temptation, Personality and Individual Differences. Volume 74, February 2015, Pages 12-15
  5. ↑ Christian Apologist: 10 Reasons for the Fall of Atheism by Gary Habermas
  6. ↑ Does religion make people more self-controlled? A review of research from the lab and life, Current Opinion in Psychology, Volume 40, August 2021, Pages 167-170
  7. ↑ Religion, Self-Regulation, and Self-Control: Associations, Explanations, and Implications
  8. ↑ Religion, Self-Regulation, and Self-Control: Associations, Explanations, and Implications
  9. ↑ Religion Replenishes Self-Control, Psychological Science, June 2012 vol. 23 no. 6 635-642, Kevin Rounding, Albert Lee, Jill A. Jacobson and Li-Jun Ji at Queen’s University
  10. ↑ Study finds religion helps us gain self-control
  11. ↑ How Prayer Affects the Brain
  12. ↑ How God Changes Your Brain: Breakthrough Findings from a Leading Neuroscientist
  13. ↑ How God Changes Your Brain: Breakthrough Findings from a Leading Neuroscientist– March 23, 2010 by Andrew Newberg M.D, Mark Robert Waldman. Pages 26,27
  14. ↑ Willpower: Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength by Roy F. Baumeister and John Tierney. Penguin Press; 1st edition (September 1, 2011)
  15. ↑ Self-Control and Exercise: A Review of the Bi-Directional Relationship, Brain Plasticity 2019; 5(1): 97–104. Published online 2019 Dec 26. Prepublished online 2019 Dec 19. doi: 10.3233/BPL-190082
  16. ↑ Self-Regulation vs. Self-Control
  17. ↑ How do you increase self-control?
  18. ↑ Neurobiology of Spirituality, E. Mohandas, M.D.
  19. ↑ The Psychology of Mindfulness, Digested
  20. ↑ A Man or a Mouse by Sunday Adelaja, Chapter 2, Golden Truth Publishing. 2018. Kindle Edition.
  21. ↑ Adelaja, Sunday. A Man or a Mouse . Golden Truth Publishing. Kindle Edition. Chapter 2
  22. ↑ The Human Body: God's Masterpiece
  23. ↑ The Enigmatic Human Brain by Wallace G. Smith
  24. ↑ The Most Complex Structure, Creation Moments
  25. ↑ Discipline
  26. ↑ Self-Motivation
  27. ↑ Learn how to be your own best ally for reaching your goals
  28. ↑ Self-Motivation
  29. ↑ Most people say self-control is the same as willpower. Researchers disagree, Science News. 2024
  30. ↑ What Is Willpower? The Psychology Behind Self-Control
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