User:Conservative/Comedy and humor

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Comedy and humor

Laurel and Hardy

GIFS:

Photoshopped or unusual pictures:

Vermont foliage and church.jpg

Christian comedy

Black and white movies humor

Laurel and Hardy

Charlie Chaplin

Fat jokes and humor

Most individuals are overweight due to their dietary and exercise habits.[1]

Funny polka song

Political humor

Quote: "This person goes on and on about politics." - From the video The Freedom Of Not Caring What A Narcissist Thinks.

This information YouTube channel

Jimmy Dore Show

Diamond and Silk

Funniest Joe Biden memes

Margaret Thatcher and voice lessons

Donald Trump

Trump impersonators

Trumpian trolling

Donald Trump

"Trolling is a performance designed to infuriate your opponent, perhaps even to expose the latter’s facade as a sham by provoking her to lose her cool. Think of the climactic scene in “A Few Good Men,” when Tom Cruise’s lawyer character needles Jack Nicholson’s colonel who’s testifying on the witness stand. The colonel forgets himself, launches into an inhuman tirade, and loses on the finer legal point at issue."[5]

"If your opponent is of choleric temperament, seek to irritate him." - Sun Tzu

Trump humor

Trump vs. Big Law

MAGA Song and other Trump related songs

Hillary Clinton humor

Hillary Clinton wasn't lying! Bosnia gunfire footage was recently discovered. VIDEO

Liberals saying Trump cannot be president

Leftist/Liberal reactions to Trump winning in 2016


Media meltdown on Trump win:

Comedy skit:

Liberals/leftist meltdowns after Trump won in 2024

Donald Trump: They're eating the dogs. They're eating the cats. They're eating the pets of the people that live there

"Aurora Lemkhul, 68, said she had taken to counting ducks around town because she fears that the Haitians, who began arriving in large numbers four years ago as the turmoil in their homeland escalated, are either eating them or perhaps using them for ritualistic purposes.

“No, I haven’t seen anybody eat anything,” she conceded. “Are they disappearing? Yes. And it’s gotten progressively worse.”

Tiffany, a 33-year-old Springfield woman, who declined to provide her surname, is convinced that Haitians nabbed her Yorkie, Desia, who disappeared about a year ago. “In my heart, I believe they took her,” she said, dismissing the possibility of a fox."[6]

Donald Trump: Making Christmas great again. "We're going to say Merry Christmas again"

Trump ad in 2024

Russian humor about Trump

‘He is like Superman and rare earth metals are like his Kryptonite’:

Another commentator on Russia 1 said that all Mr Putin has done is offer Mr Trump potential business deals, which he called the “kryptonite” of the US president.

“Trump is like Superman and our president Putin has found his weakness,” said Nikita Danyuk, a member of the public chamber of the Russian Federation to Russian state media outlet Channel 1.

“As soon as Trump hears ‘rare earth metals’, it doesn’t matter if those metals are there or not. He forgets about anything and is ready to accept any terms. It’s truly a grandmaster game by our president.”

Federal workers cast Trump's many weekend Mar-a-Lago trips as working from home. SAD!

USA: It's lonely at the top, having fairer trade, having a very secure border and being the leader for the foreseeable future

Kamala Harris roast video

Miscellaneous

Weak, Girly-boy Obama vs. Vladimir Putin

Liberal Yale professor vs. SJW/Identity politics/liberal students

General, contemporary

Photoshopped pictures:

Sharise Parviz

Leftists/SJW humor

Alex Jones

Alex Jones

Other political humor/craziness

Other Political humor, historical

Margaret Thatcher

Margaret Thatcher was Prime Minister of the United Kingdom from 1979 to 1990. She was the longest-serving Prime Minister in the 20th century.

Thatcher was often vilified by the British press.

Soviet Union

Funny moments in American politics

Funniest moments in British politics

Thatcher:

Democrats vs. Republicans

Democratic strategist admits Democrats are effete pantywaists! "We just don't seem to have the guts to just go out and go play politics the way Republicans do." - Ben Tribbett, a Virginia-based Democratic operative.[7]

Humor related to communism

"The underpinnings of China’s growth seem fragile from historical and analytical perspectives. Even if no crises materialize, unfavorable demographics, high debt levels, and an inefficient financial system will constrain China’s growth."[2]

Is there anything more fragile than an economy run by communists - especially one that has the cult of personality surrounding Xi Jinping?

Question: Are Chinese vases less fragile than Xi Jinping's inept leadership?

Anarcho-Syndicalist Commune

Republican workouts

China

China's failed toilet revolution

2024: No Doors, No Flush, Face-To-Butt Toilets Still Used by Hundreds of Millions in China

Note to the Chinese: Don't turn to Russia for assistance! See: Russia's sewage system crisis

India PROVES China’s Army is a Paper Tiger - Chinese weapons Exposed in India-Pakistan War

Trump effect vs. Putin effect



“Sadly the American dream is dead, but if I get elected president I will bring it back. Bigger, better and stronger than ever before.” - Donald Trump

See: The United States will be the leading power in the world for the foreseeable future

American computer programmer genius in the AI field. Yankee ingenuity at its finest!

The Roman Civilization lasted about 2,200 years.

  • What are the arguments that the American civilization lasts longer than the Roman civilization?: "Arguments that the American civilization will last longer than the Roman civilization often point to factors like America's democratic system, its robust economy, and its geographical advantages. Additionally, some argue that America's capacity for innovation and adaptation are key to its longevity, while the Roman Empire faced internal and external pressures that led to its decline. Here's a more detailed look at these arguments...".

American computer programmers are truly outstanding! USA! USA! USA!

The United States will likely be the strongest country for the foreseeable future and this is due to the strengths of the USA and partly due to the weaknesses of China and Russia.

Please see: The United States will be the leading power in the world for the foreseeable future

Russian politics and other humor

Russia's partnering with godless Chinese regime:

Amidst Chinese property crisis, high Chinese youth unemployment, etc.: Vladimir Putin "declared that he and Mr Xi were “as close as brothers” and went on to praise China’s economy, saying it was “developing in leaps and bounds, at a fast pace”. This will likely play well with Beijing officials worried by a sluggish economy." - BBC, 2024: Putin and Xi no longer have a partnership of equals

Other humorous events and observations:


"Hey, it looks like I am no longer the craziest leader." - Kim Jong Un on Vladimir Putin (Fake but funny quote).

Mark Rutte, the Secretary General of NATO, praises Trump strategy to boost the NATO alliance. Fox News shows goose stepping Russians in the background

See also: Donald J. Trump warns Vladmir Putin and a weakened Russia about the significance of September 2, 2025

Please see: PUTIN'S DEADLINE: Trump's ultimatum sends MAJOR signal

Mark Rutte, the Secretary General of NATO, praises Trump strategy to boost the NATO alliance. Fox News shows goose stepping Russians in the background.

Please see: PUTIN'S DEADLINE: Trump's ultimatum sends MAJOR signal



Goose stepping changing of the guards in Russia at the Kremlin in 2006.[3]

Video: Goose-stepping guards at the Kremlin

In 2014, international relations scholar John Mearsheimer said: "Russia is a declining power, and it will only get weaker with time."[4]

Putin a lonely man

In 2022 and 2023 Putin attends church services that consist only of himself (Not intended to be funny, but crazy):

"The Russian president, Vladimir Putin, attended an Orthodox church Christmas service by himself inside a Kremlin cathedral on Saturday. State television showed two live clips of Putin inside the gilded Cathedral of the Annunciation as Orthodox priests conducted the midnight service, known as the Divine Liturgy. The 70-year-old also attended Christmas by himself last year at his official Novo-Ogaryovo residence outside Moscow." - Guardian, 2023[9]

Russia trying to populate the arctic area which often does not have indoor toilets

Bathroom toilet

"The Arctic region, Siberia and the vast Far East are empty, but at the same time are widely known as strategic regions. These several years, Russia has proposed numerous projects and initiatives, primarily aim at raising these regions’ environment for habitation, emphasizing its importance for international cooperation. Russia’s policy to re-populated these places failed terribly, even Russians were promised doubled income and land, but without positive results. They remain with extremely low population."[10]

Russia's sewage problem is out of control! The excrement has hit the fan big time!

Once again, more data literally pours in relating to my research on Russia. As I have indicated previously, the USA does have a MUCH better sewage system than Russia. I forecast that this will remain true for the foreseeable future.

  • PROOF: Russia's Economy is Collapsing, April 2024. Mark Biernat, a monetary economist and an academic researcher, claims Russia does not have a good economy. Lack of indoor toilets in many rural areas proves this! "Ph.D. student in Poland and teacher of college economics in the US. Thought experiments in the history of economics with some humor. I look at the great economists of the past and their theories, relate them to today, and make them relevant to your life."[11]

I'm glad that I plan on vacationing in St. Petersburg, Russia rather than Moscow.

"BREAKING: Poop exploded everywhere landing on the road, cars, people, and pets the moment a sewage pipe pressure test in Nanning, China failed. This scene of horror shows feces falling from the sky after the initial explosion in China.

China and Russia are going to need to get their sh*t together before they break the back of the USA!

Skyscraper-high sewage plume of feces erupts in Moscow.[1]

See: Russia's sewage system crisis

Classic video: Tucker Carlson in a Russian supermarket talking about how great it was and how good the prices were - a year before Russians were stealing butter and war-related inflation caused sky-high inflation

Please see:



I used to be more interested in Russia, but the ButterGate scandal put a damper on that.

Russian President Vladimir Putin says that Russia's war economy is well balanced to supply both guns and butter, but the price of butter itself is now soaring as surging inflation distorts parts of the economy. The price of a block of butter has risen by 25.7 per cent since December, according to the state statistics service.

'The Armageddon with butter is escalating,' Russian economists claim on Telegram.

See: Butter prices soar in Russia amid surging inflation in war economy, CBC News, November 2, 2024 and Russians Resort to Stealing Butter Amid Shortages, Newsweek, October 29, 2024

Classic video: Tucker Carlson in a Russian supermarket talking about how great it was and how good the prices were - a year before Russians were stealing butter and war-related inflation caused sky-high inflation:Tucker Carlson Shopping in Russian Grocery Store (Full)

Joke about contemporary Russia

A factory worker in a Western country shows his house to his Russian colleague.

- "Here's my room, this one is my wife's, this is my eldest daughter's, that's our dining room, then the guest bedroom. Here's the bathroom." etc.

The Russian guest nods and says, after a pause:

- "Well, it's basically similar to mine. Only we don't have the internal walls or an indoor toilet."[12][13]

Russia’s anti-Olympics turns into Soviet-style joke

Dark humor: Texas fool who moved to Russia with his family for traditional values is put on the Ukraine front lines with little training because he does not know Russian well

Russian state media attacks Melania Trump. Melania Trump convinces Donald Trump to no longer trust Vladimir Putin. Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn!



Melania Trump

Trump reveals Melania's key role in dealing with Putin on Ukraine war, July 14, 2025

First lady Melania Trump points out Russian attacks that follow diplomatic calls between Trump and Putin.

Googleplex: They truly have some computer programmer geniuses when it comes to AI

Behold the computer programmer geniuses at work at Google AI!

  • What are the arguments that Russia is not a great power?: "Arguments against Russia being a great power focus on its limited economic and technological capabilities, coupled with a history of impulsive foreign policy decisions and internal struggles. While Russia possesses a significant military, it lacks the economic and technological strength of true great powers."

Russia's President Vladimir Putin, a frequent critic of the United States, admitted about American's openness, open-mindedness and creativity: "I like the creativity. Creativity when it comes to tackling your country's problems. They're openness. Openness and open-mindedness. Because it allows them to unleash the inner potential of their people. And because of that America has achieved such amazing results."(See: Preview: Vladimir Putin reveals what he admires about America, CBS News, 2016).

Vladimir Putin

Lefty Riddhi Patel a Pro-Palestine activist gone wild at council meeting in Bakersfield, California faces 18 felony counts. Cries when arrested

Conflict between journalists and politicians

Ronald Reagan


Ben Jacobs:

Ukraine

Volodymyr Zelenskyy had cards up his sleeves. Zelenskyy plays the Trump card, the U.S. Senate card and drone war cards

Trump card.png

See also: Volodymyr Zelensky - Video playlist, Video playlist

Trump tells Zelenskyyy he has no cards: Full argument: Trump-Zelensky White House meeting descends into shouting match, March 2025

Volodymyr Zelenskyy had cards up his sleeves:

About a month ago, Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) took a trip to Ukraine to advocate for greater pressure against Russia. “President Trump said Ukraine doesn’t have good cards…but the world has a lot of cards against Russia,” Graham said. “And one of those cards we have is about to be played in the United States Senate.” He continued the analogy: “In America you have more than one person at the card table. We have three branches of government, and the House and the Senate are poised to act.”[14]

More sanctions, especially secondary sanctions, might bring Putin/Russia to their knees. See: Can Trump sanctions on Russia force Putin's hand?, 2025

Since January 2024, Russian forces have achieved only minimal territorial gains at an extremely slow rate of advance (slower than WWI’s Battle of the Somme), while suffering staggering casualties and disproportionally high equipment cost.[15]

Crazy feminists



Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Crazy newscaster/journalism/commentator moments

Dog humor

Basset Hound

Fido and Fluffy vs. the global warming alarmists

Secular leftist pet owner: "I am really sad that my dog died."

Tomi Lahren: "If you truly believed in global warming and thought it was a serious and urgent problem Mr. Secular Leftist, you would be happy that meat eating dog died because according to you that dog was needlessly contributing to a very grave and serious environmental problem that imperils humanity and all life on the earth. If you truly believed in global warming you would be happy your pet dog died. Furthermore, you would believe that your dog was merely a collection of atoms. Now repeat after me, 'I am very happy that my meat-eating dog died. And I hope my cat dies soon.' Say it! I can't hear you!"

Other humorous clips

Comedy related to homosexual agenda

Funny songs

"Masculine women, feminine men, which is the rooster which is the hen? It's hard to tell 'em apart today." - Edgar Leslie's and James V. Monaco's 1920s song Masculine women, feminine men

Song from the 1920s

"Masculine women, feminine men, which is the rooster which is the hen? It's hard to tell 'em apart today." - Edgar Leslie's and James V. Monaco's 1920s song Masculine women, feminine men

Funny songs/videos from the 1930s

Comedy/humor related to atheism

Santa syndrome:

Other:

SJW atheist Thomas Smith vs. Carl Benjamin

Atheism is madness

Australian seculars/atheists confronting Muslims

UK seculars vs. UK Muslims

Islam TV hostess vs. Egyptian secular

Video: Guns don't kill people. Atheists kill people.

See also: List of atheist shooters and serial killers

Bill O'Reilly vs. atheists

Question Evolution! campaign - 13 year old recruited for the campaign

Comedy/humor related to religion

Sweden

Satire of the godless, libertine Swedish Agriculture Minister - Eskil Erlandsson

British

United Kingdom flag

Scotch-Irish

Scotch-Irish temper

Irish-American comedian Bill Burr

Stupid pet tricks

Golden Retriever

Don Rickles

Bill Burr

Music jokes

Wikipedia quote

"...dealing with the Wikipedians is like walking into a mental hospital: the floors are carpeted, the walls are nicely padded, but you know there’s a pretty good chance at any given moment one of the inmates will pick up a knife.” - quote from a New York Times article on Wikipedia written by the journalist and author Judith Newman[16]

Covid-19 and medicine

Covid-19 pandemic and masks

Rodrigo Duterte is president of the Philippines.

"The Philippines have introduced a new rule forcing everyone in the country to wear a face shield, as well as a face mask, while out in public."[5]

Anti-maskers vs. the police

Anti-masker tantrums

Anti-maskers

Bill Burr On Anti-Vax Conspiracy Theories - CONAN on TBS

Economics

  • Econ Lessons, Mark Biernat, Monetary economist (He doesn't mean to be funny, but he is)

Men and women relations

Religiousness of the USA

Being overly competitive and competition oriented rather than achievement oriented



Quotes from the 1998 movie US Marshals

Please see: Achievement orientation vs. competitive mindset

Humorous pictures



Bear roadkill2.jpg



Conservative of the year 2024 nomination (Humor): Saudi Prince Mohammed bin Salman

Conservative of the year 2024 nomination (Humor):

Saudi Prince Mohammed bin Salman, who Donald Trump talked to around April 2024[17], for likely helping the Saudis decide to not ramp up oil production until December 2024[18][19][20], which is very near the time that Donald T. Trump will be in office and the Democrats will not be (Bonus points: The kingdom is very anti-gay and tough on crime which is very conservative). The Americans and Saudis are the two biggest producers of oil and when Trump is in office, there is going to be a lot of oil! Drill, baby, drill! See: Donald Trump’s Presidency Will Likely Boost U.S. Oil Output In 2025, Fortune, November 6, 2024. Oil Prices Fall as Trump Inches Toward Victory, Oilprice.com, November 6, 2024).

FYI: Blow to Putin's War Machine As Saudi Arabia Ramps Up Oil Production, 2024. This is not good for Vladimir Putin who is the leader of Russia. Russia raised taxes in 2021 and plans on raising taxes again in 2025 on the rich/companies to help pay for the war in Ukraine.[21] Raising taxes is generally considered to be something liberals do and something conservatives do not do.

Web marketing humor

Quote attributed to User: Conservative

"Also, if the state of Minnesota can't even get its policing right as evidenced by its burned down police station in Minneapolis, how in the world can it confidently assert how old the earth is?" - Quote attributed to User: Conservative, but the link is dead.

My "algorithm pages" which control Conservapedia and the internet. Abracadabra! Hocus pocus!

Please see: My "algorithm pages" which control Conservapedia and the internet. Abracadabra! Hocus pocus!

Question: Does User: Conservative control Conservapedia and the internet via "algorithm pages"?

For more information, please see: My "algorithm page" which controls Conservapedia and the internet. Abracadabra! Hocus pocus!

Pointing out vivid and humorous weaknesses of your debate opponent's position can really trip up your debate opponent



Pointing out vivid and humorous weaknesses of your debate opponent's position can really trip up your debate opponent and win a debate.

It can also cause him to become horse-throwing mad and clearly rattled.

See also: Cheetah running after prey videos - video playlist, Video playlist

What internet drama kings and queens remind me of

Please read: What internet drama kings and queens remind me of


Jokes about narcissists

Quote: "This person goes on and on about politics." - From the video The Freedom Of Not Caring What A Narcissist Thinks.

Quote: "This person goes on and on about politics." - From the video The Freedom Of Not Caring What A Narcissist Thinks.

Question: Is there anything worse than a hostile, narcissistic clown who drones on and on about his wrongheaded opinions on politics?

It is very freeing to not care what a narcissist thinks and to completely remove the person from your life. There is nothing more replaceable in your life than a hostile, narcissistic clown.

See: Cut toxic people out of your life and replace them with edifying achievers who inspire you

See also: The power of upgrading your social network and reading excellent works

See also: The case for being less partisan/political and being more objective

Fantasy Island and grandiose narcissists

"Grandiose narcissists often inhabit a fantasy world where they are superior, admired, and entitled. This fantasy serves as a coping mechanism to maintain a fragile sense of self-esteem. They may imagine themselves as powerful leaders, exceptionally attractive individuals, or possessors of unique talents and abilities."[23]

"De plane De plane. Welcome to Fantasy Island."[24]

"Grandiose narcissists often inhabit a fantasy world where they are superior, admired, and entitled. This fantasy serves as a coping mechanism to maintain a fragile sense of self-esteem. They may imagine themselves as powerful leaders, exceptionally attractive individuals, or possessors of unique talents and abilities."[2]

"De plane De plane. Welcome to Fantasy Island."[3]

Grandiose narcissist with IQ between 80-120 shows that he definitely lacks machismo

See also: Narcissistic personality disorder and Grandiose narcissism and Narcissistic rivalry and Narcissistic smear campaign and Narcissistic rage and Agreeableness and Intelligence and Intelligence testing

File:Bullfighter in Spain.png
Bullfighter in Spain

When a grandiose narcissist claims your dumb, grab the bull by the horns and challenge him to an intellectual dual via taking Mensa IQ tests.

Please see: Intellectual dual challenge to RobSmith given on 11-26-2024

Please see: Grandiose narcissist with IQ score between 80 - 120 shows that he definitely lacks machismo

Relevant research:

A 2023 Australian study found that highly intelligent grandiose narcissists (whose intelligence quotient is above 115 or 120) are less likely to exhibit narcissistic rivalry.[6][7]

Research indicates that high IQ people are more cooperative than low IQ people.[8] See also: Agreeableness and Narcissistic rivalry and Narcissistic smear campaign and Narcissistic rage

Other research:



machismo
Olé! Olé! Olé!

One of the definitions of machismo is an "exhilarating sense of power or strength."[9]

The grandiose narcissist could solve his personal problem through educating himself about grandiose narcissism and through changing his personality so it displays more agreeableness

The above grandiose narcissist could solve his personal problem through educating himself about grandiose narcissism and changing his personality so it displays more of the personality trait of agreeableness.

He could also cultivate the virtues of affability and humility which is very doable - especially with God's assistance.

Progress through Education by the Filipino Carlos V. Francisco.

Please see:

Potential problems faced by the grandiose narcissist that could hinder positive change:



My dog at my homework is a common adage related to excusitis among students on why they supposedly can't hand in their homework when it is due to be completed.



(Archive copy of this section: Grandiose narcissist with IQ between 80-120 shows that he definitely lacks machismo)

International weather expert

Just in case you read Conservapedia's main page right and are afraid that all of your nephews' are going to be drafted for WWIII (which allegedly started in 2022 according to Conservapedia's self-appointed international politics expert)

I hope things are going well for you.

Just in case you read main page right and are afraid that your nephews are going to be drafted for WWIII (which allegedly started in 2022 according to Conservapedia's self-declared international politics expert).

"Persoanlly, I believe NATO has been at war with Russia for 10 years, and WWIII started 2 years ago." - RobSThe Truth. Just Putin It Out There 23:07, June 18, 2024 (EDT)"

Are we headed towards WWIII? It's not likely - at least not yet

See also: Are we headed towards WWIII? It's not likely - at least not yet (Archive version)

There is a new war. Oh, no!

I will never get out of my bunny hole! It must be WWIII!

Please see (including the video): Some Clear Thinking on why World War III is NOT happening anytime soon


There is a new war. Oh, no! It's WWIII!

Please see (including the video): Some Clear Thinking on why World War III is NOT happening anytime soon


According to the National Peanut Board, American women and children prefer creamy peanut butter, while most American men prefer chunky peanut butter.[4]

If you are a gentleman who is scared that WWIII has started despite a lack of evidence that it has, stop eating smooth peanut butter and consider the possibility that you lack machismo.


(Archive version of this post)

You will be able to celebrate your nephews' birthdays this year. They will not be drafted for WWIII (which allegedly started in 2022 according to Conservapedia's self-appointed international politics expert).

References

  1. ↑
  2. ↑ China Stumbles, but it is Unlikely to Fall by Eswar S. Prasad, December 2023
  3. ↑ Changing of the guards in Russia at the Kremlin, 2006
  4. ↑ Why the Ukraine Crisis Is the West’s Fault, Foreign Affairs, Published August 18, 2014
  5. ↑ PHILIPPINE GOVERNMENT MAKES FACE MASKS AND SHIELDS MANDATORY IN PUBLIC
  6. ↑ Highly intelligent grandiose narcissists are less prone to narcissistic rivalry, PsyPost, June 22, 2023
  7. ↑ Intelligent grandiose narcissists are less likely to exhibit narcissistic rivalry, Personality and Individual Differences. Volume 209, July 2023, 112212
  8. ↑ Hive Mind: The Synergistic Effects of Being Around Really Smart People by Steven Handel
  9. ↑ Machismo
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